Suicide is a dark path. We have only scratched the surface on this particular case. No one will ever know all the details. For those that don't understand it, just think of it this way. It's kind of like the dark side of the Force. "Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny". Once you have seriously considered suicide as a way out, it will always be there in the back of your mind for whenever things get tough. Yes, it's crazy. And yes, it should be treated as a mental illness. And yes, if you have ever thought of it, seek help. Not necessarily in the form of a doctor. Sometimes having a friend, or connection with someone else is enough to bring home the fact that suicide isn't the answer.
