cristycurves said:
I find it somewhat humorous that in a society that constantly honors and idolizes youth, superficiality, and makes idols out of people simply for their appearances, and in a country that voted in a narcissistic, lying, misogynistic buffoon for a president, that they would then castigate a women ( who is only 30, who makes her living in a superficial industry and who uses social media as most do), for being superficial and moronic.Why is anyone surprised by her actions? Aren't we hyperbolizing the issue at hand? Younger people make fun of older people every minute, people post their stuff they see, appropriate or not, on social media every minute, just as some used to whisper to friends and family decades ago. Times have changed as to how we deliver our thoughts and messages, but people haven't changed..... This isn't to say I'm not angry at her, and I do feel she was wrong, but I'm also realistic and know that we (society) help create morons like this, my industry helps, and so does anyone or any industry that promotes beauty as being "only" skin deep.How amny people on this board have made fun of someones appearance....... So before to many jump on the self righteous indignation bandwagon, we should think that there are many of us who've said or done some things that are just as shallow and ignorant. But that's just my opinion, and what do I know....:-Cool/"
Like anyone, we only truly know our own experiences. So if you are or have been shallow and ignorant in the past, if you have made fun of completely strangers for no other reason then to be cruel and heartless to get a personal giggle, then I can see how you could relate to Ms. Mathers.
You have the right to the opinion that I am self righteous and all that, but you also have the right to be completely wrong. I can't say I have ever made fun of some random person's looks. I have never made fun of the elderly, I have never targeted a complete stranger, body shamed them and humiliated them for anyone to see, let alone the entire world. This poor woman wanted a new backpack because that is how people identified her. It is so sad that she was randomly victimized like that. Maybe because I too have been victimized by people, I am a different breed. Who knows.
I have not used social media to bully, or berate someone. I have called people names of course. I have called people bitches, assholes, etc. I am not disputing that. However I feel that is was all in context. Meaning the person actually did something to me or had interaction with me that I personally felt warranted the comments. I can't say that I have ever made fun of someone's appearance. I have never laughed and said "look at that fat ass" or stared at some disability that someone had. I have always gravitated to the more unique and different I guess and that maybe taught me not to judge people based on their appearance. Personality traits, personal hygiene, attitude, mannerisms, etc. - Sure, but never just based on someone's appearance alone - no. I can't think of a single time and believe me, I really thought hard about that before replying here.
When comments are made about those personality traits, etc - it is again with people I have had actual interaction with. When all the neighbours are gossiping, I don't get involved. When it is "did you hear so-n-so was busted cheating and do blow," My comment is always the same " I never knew that, I don't really talk to so-n-so, so I am not really going to talk so-n-so." I guess that is why I am not privy to the gossip anymore. I just never got into the whispers as you call them.
I never raised my young children to make fun of elderly or use social media in such a negative way. My son, in teens, did use FB once against a peer he was having issues with, I drove him to the police station to be arrested. Brought my daughter along, and they learned rather quickly the appropriate way to use social media. Haven't had an issue since. In my family we deal with issues like cancer, poverty was a big one for a long time, different types of abuse. Whispers and gossip, again was not high on our priority list. But as you have said, what do I know? Maybe the world is more like you and people like Ms.Mathers. It seems to be heading in that direction in some ways.
However I am thankful that there are many others who disagree. I am happy she has been charged, I am happy that people have been made aware that even if so many people do it, IT IS STILL WRONG!
Now you also have the opinion that we as a society have created this. That even this industry of escorting has somehow lent a hand to this skin deep beauty concept that you are talking about, and I guess if that is how you perceive the message, then again, that is on you personally. I am a full figured woman, I look for more of an intimate encounter based on high sexuality and engaging personality. Nothing really in my personal escort world, that has anything to do with skin deep beauty. Not in my opinion anyway. That may be a agree to disagree to thing. One thing I will say, just because society puts a certain model of beauty out to the world for people to strive for, I can't agree that those same companies, people, etc have said make fun of those who don't match this. With all the talk about shaming, body shaming, beauty shaming and with all the awareness being made out there, with rules on too-thin modelling, with all the changes in commercials like Dove, Special K, and AdditionElle, with all the social justice campaigns, the numerous talk show topics, etc - clearly many people in society are trying to teach and help create something very different then what you are saying.
However that is just my opinion, and if the world truly is as you say and I am wrong, then clearly it is me who doesn't know what they are talking about.
now it shows when you do, sorry if that too has upset you. And to be clear the definition of self righteous indignation is when some chastises someone for doing something they think wrong and then uses that chastisement as a platform to show how right they are and or that they would never err as erroneously as the person they're chastising. Which imo, is something you did in your first response to me. Although you claim you were just sharing your experience.So be it.... Some people will see it as you've explained, others as I've seen it. Regardless, and apparently, you read into things that I didn't mean, and I read into things that you don't mean. C'est la vie
