How Am I?

[Blank_Dave]

Oh now I remember...

My therapist has me looking at social activities/groups/clubs. The idea is to expand my social circle, but also to potentially develop relationships with others (read nonsexual). So I have a list of local clubs, charities, and service organizations to look through. I just have no idea what to try out, lol.

I do know I don't want to do charity work, I did that in HS and I no longer found it to be rewarding. He agreed with me on that.

LOL, no friggin' idea.....Definitely not Big Brothers. Either I don't know what they're about, or I don't really have much interest in them. I know Toast Masters was mentioned...Just I work on the nights they meet, lol,

 

[Auggie]

It's great you want to find out who you are after being repressed so long, but I don't think the answer lies in seeing escorts like others are advising.
In our society this is an anti-social behaviour and your therapist would more likely steer you to an activity that isn't secretive and where you'll meet people socially without an exchange of money.

 

[Blank_Dave]

It's great you want to find out who you are after being repressed so long, but I don't think the answer lies in seeing escorts like others are advising.

Definitely agree on that, Auggie. The answers aren't to be found in the arms of strangers. They're all ultimately squirreled away in my heart, and it's up to me to find the keys to the various compartments. Sometimes I might need help with it though.

In our society this is an anti-social behaviour and your therapist would more likely steer you to an activity that isn't secretive and where you'll meet people socially without an exchange of money.

Guess that would also rule out satanic cults, vigilante gangs, and combat racing organizations....But I would tend to agree, that he'd be in favour of a more socially acceptable activity.

That's where I'm hitting a dead end though. I grew up with two messages that are really haunting me in this. "Don't try it, you mightn't like it and be stuck with it" and "Do it right or don't do it at all." They combine to result in Paralysis From Analysis.

So that has be kinda bummed and demotivated, plus I'm tired.....

 

[Auggie]

I grew up with two messages that are really haunting me in this. "Don't try it, you mightn't like it and be stuck with it" and "Do it right or don't do it at all." They combine to result in Paralysis From Analysis.

So that has be kinda bummed and demotivated, plus I'm tired.....

I hear you, I got the same message growing up. Many of us spend our entire adult lives trying to get over childhood, you're not alone in this.

Good luck!

 

[Weirdo]

I hear you, I got the same message growing up. Many of us spend our entire adult lives trying to get over childhood, you're not alone in this.

Good luck!

Shit, don't remind me.

 

[Blank_Dave]

Grrrrrrr

Grrrrrrr

Last week my therapist suggested I have a look at three books.....On emotional incest. (Look it up yourselves)

So I picked them up and started reading. Now I could understand the theory behind the books. I could relate to where the victims were in their heads and how we were similar. But I couldn't relate to the victim's relationships with their mothers. They were usually held in relatively "high regard" by their mothers, I was just there.

Anyway...I was at work mulling this over, when a couple of memories bubbled up. With my new knowledge, they clicked right into place with the above subject. I nearly threw up on the spot. And it's been bothering me since. When I try to think about it, just to come to terms, my stomach just starts to roll.

oh joy

 

[Columbo]

Last week my therapist suggested I have a look at three books.....On emotional incest. (Look it up yourselves)

So I picked them up and started reading. Now I could understand the theory behind the books. I could relate to where the victims were in their heads and how we were similar. But I couldn't relate to the victim's relationships with their mothers. They were usually held in relatively "high regard" by their mothers, I was just there.

Anyway...I was at work mulling this over, when a couple of memories bubbled up. With my new knowledge, they clicked right into place with the above subject. I nearly threw up on the spot. And it's been bothering me since. When I try to think about it, just to come to terms, my stomach just starts to roll.

oh joy

Sorry Dave missed most of your history. Your mother wasn't good to you when you were growing up?.

 

[SillyGirl]

When I try to think about it, just to come to terms, my stomach just starts to roll.

oh joy

I hope you will be patient with yourself, Dave. Those things that make us sick just to think about are hard to look in the eye, but are also the things we have to acknowledge and process before we can move past them.

It's unrealistic to expect yourself to come to terms with it immediately. You also won't be able to put it away now that it's out there. Please don't expect yourself to just deal with it overnight and be done with it, it just doesn't work that way.

 

[SiNbaD]

Don't know you but best to you Dave.