Light 'Em Up!

[Flash Bazbo]

Tomorrow night, the Danforth Music Hall is where the action is, for professional boxing. My homeboy Chordale Booker will be fighting professionally outside the USA for the first time, and for longer than six scheduled rounds. He's 6-0, with three knockouts, (Super Welterweight). I don't know much about his opponent, Carlos Villaneuva, a local. Four other Canadians, (Heavyweight and Lightweight classes), round out the undercard.

I've never been inclined to want to take a punch to the face, but when two guys want to do that to each other, I want to watch. If Booker can take Villaneueva in eight rounds or less, I'll have $5K burning a hole in my pocket, looking for a new home. More info:



For those of you on a budget, tickets are available at a discount, (ie: no ticketmaster fees), at the Hard Knocks Gym, 358 Queen East, just east of Parliament Street after 11:00 AM. They'll have live sparring there sometime soon, on Tuesdays and Thursdays, check in with them, for details. (416) 792-1531, and feel free to drop my name.

 

[Wes]

Who watches boxing anymore. The UFC is where the cool people hang out now days.

 

[Anto]

I rather watch bowling than either one.

 

[Candyman]

Who watches boxing anymore. The UFC is where the cool people hang out now days.

Notice something sticking out?.

 

[Guido]

WTF, Candyman :NoNoNo:

 

[Flash Bazbo]

Notice something sticking out?.

You slay me, pal! That's gold. Adrenaline is a powerful natural opiate. If prostitution is the world's oldest profession, boxing was probably invented the same day.

The connection between combat and procreation can be seen in all living things. We see this when big horn sheep but heads, the female is naturally attracted to the male with the best genes, as she has a vested interest in having those genes passed to her offspring. The male who fathers children and the one who raises them frequently possess different virtues, and different vices. All members of any species are well suited to be breeding stock.

This is the driving force of evolution; survival of the fittest. Were this not so, sentient live would never exist. The urge to kill for reasons other than food and consciousness are intertwined; this is the true message of 2001: A Space Odyssey.

Things have changed in recent times: In vitro fertilization, falling natural birth rates, as a result of environmental pollution, genetically modified food, medical advancements, contraception, machinery replacing manual labour, and two consecutive world wars, in which the majority of the finest physical and mental specimens were lost, and re-population was largely left to those deemed unfit for combat, and those too young to have fought.

On the plus side, in comparing people alive in 1917 vs 2017, the average height and life expectancy of individuals is higher, but the muscle tone and general health is lower. When manual labor is the norm, the individual is more likely to be strong. When machines do most of the physical labor, and a lifestyle is more sedentary, it's natural to expect that obesity would be much more common; walking burns fat, driving a car doesn't. playing competitive sports burns fat, playing video games doesn't.

 

[Prick]

Fight is on TV.

 

[Devilonfloor]

Notice something sticking out?.

 

[jumpingjackflash]

HAHAHAHA Candyman, only you would see the little penis. Imagine a punch to the little fella.

 

[Fuggedabouditt]

Notice something sticking out?.

That's his thumb.

 

[Flash Bazbo]

The card was entertaining, even though the main event was cancelled, without public explanation. Several unbilled bouts were added instead. Chordale Booker was denied entry to Canada, for reasons not fully explained. That action possibly cost me $5K. Once Octavia and I were informed that Chordale would be a late scratch, we made the best of a bad situation, and freely partook of alcoholic libations.

Patrice Volny out of Montreal was impressive in the first bout, registering a third round knockout against some Mexican, with a completely different style. My cat could have taken the next guy, making his professional debut. Jessie Wilcox was on his way to victory, when an accidental head butt ended his match prematurely. Some guy from England in black trunks with gold trim was skilled but not powerful, in winning an 8 round decision, and the next most entertaining pairing for the fans was undoutably the interspecies match, in which 'Callie the Mallie', a dog trained by the armed forces special services, raised her record to 12-0, against some guy in a sumo suit, or something like that.

Best dressed award in the crowd went to the guy wearing an orange jumpsuit, and a thick gold chain, but ironically, he was a melanin-challenged ginger. All he needed was half a shackle around one ankle, and a cop's nightstick in one hand, to complete a great Hallowe'en disguise. Lee Baxter did a great job of salvaging what could have been a disaster, and no one present felt gyped by not seeing a name fighter on the card.

Notably absent in the crowd were fathers with their sons, although one guy did bring his young daughter, who was having a ball, especially during the dog vs man match. It was also refreshing to see a crowd of 'real men and real women', instead of the no fun police, who try to make everyone else' life as miserable as their own. Believe you me, no man at a boxing match sits to pee in the Gents' head!

Surprising to many of you is the fact that about 40% of the crowd was women. It's a fact that anyone who says they don't like to see structured hand to hand combat is a liar, a pussy, or both, regardless of their gender. There were a fair share of ghetto chicks, proud of their overly large behinds, but a lot of classy ladies, as well, those who do not chose to be spoken for, on their behalf, by the bitter betties with axes to grind against anything not fem-centric, and inclusive. I didn't see anyone noticeably gay, and no trannies nor shims, either. I guess the rain scared them away.