No Shows - missed appointments, etc

[Danolo]

I'd like your opinions, both from you hobbyists and you SP's.

A while ago, I made an appointment with a SP for an incall. As it happened, I had to cancel.

All our communication had been by email, so I felt confident that I could cancel by email. Unfortunately, my cancellation email did not get to her. I thought I sent my cancellation email about two days before our appointment, but it did not go to her. This was totally my fault, I hit the wrong button and my email did not get sent to her.

I didn't get a reply, but I just figured she was pissed because I cancelled.

So, come the day, I get an email from her, wondering where I am, wondering if I was late, etc. When I got those emails, a couple of hours after our original appointment time, I immediately investigated and discovered my error.

I emailed her right away, and apologized.

My question for you folks is this: Should I have re-imbursed her for the loss she suffered from my error? If so, the full amount? Half?

I'd like to hear from you what YOU think I should have done, then I'll tell you what i actually did.

 

[Madman]

It was an honest mistake on your part and I would say half would be a nice gesture. Mistakes do happen, maybe half with another booking of a session if she will allow it. This way you get the service and she makes a little more money.

 

[Bridgette_xo]

Ask her what her cancellation rate is and that you would like to reimburse her. Or book her again and either add on the cancellation rate or a nice tip as an apology.

 

[Kyra.Graves]

These situations always remind me of an article I read about a year ago on Intent vs. Impact and why intentions don't really matter. If I am reading your post correctly you didn't actually cancel the appointment, you simply intended to but through user error did not. I am sure we have all made a simple error in the past, been defeated by technology or had various issues come up however in this circumstance it was not that you notified her two days in advance it is that you intended to. When you didn't hear from her you made an assumption about what her response might be but again did not follow-up to check and confirm though your sent box if your email had reached her or send out a simple follow-up to say "Again I am sorry for the cancellation but I really want to make sure that you received my original message, can you at least confirm so I know you received it?" You could have let her know you wanted to give her ample time to cancel the hotel (and reduce other overhead) or fill the time with another client thus covering her costs. While your intentions were good your actions had a very real impact on her, your intentions don't really matter to her business.

As for what to do about it now, well I would guess that you should really be reaching out to her and discussing that. If you do not value her and her time then it isn't really a discussion but if you wish to have a relationship with her in the future then I would suggest it should be up to her what sort of arrangement she would find acceptable. We can all speculate on what sort of arrangement we might appreciate but we would be making assumptions about her situation, her business and costs as well as your relationship with her and all of these factors will come into play. If you have never met her before, if she has a business model similar to mine where she would only be seeing you that day and would have reserved the hotel specifically for you then you may find yourself in a situation where she was out hundreds of dollars and hours of her time and the "give her $20 for her time" sort of response that is sometimes offered up would be seen as a large insult. On the other hand if you have an ongoing relationship with her and know that she will see a number of clients in a day then perhaps her costs were already covered and she will value the relationship with a long term client over that of a few hundred dollars.

You really need to find out what impact it had on her and let her tell you what would be satisfactory. Apologies and intentions only go so far in business situations and while I am sure she understands it was an honest mistake it was a user error and when that happens we usually face consequences.

 

[papasmerf]

So when a lady cancels with little or no notice. When she is a no show or does not answer.

Does she pay a fee for the inconvenience?

 

[Ridgeman08]

Ask her what her cancellation rate is and that you would like to reimburse her. Or book her again and either add on the cancellation rate or a nice tip as an apology.

You really need to find out what impact it had on her and let her tell you what would be satisfactory. Apologies and intentions only go so far in business situations and while I am sure she understands it was an honest mistake it was a user error and when that happens we usually face consequences.

Good answers, from 2 well spoken and very smart SP's... but:

This was my first reaction to this as well.

So when a lady cancels with little or no notice. When she is a no show or does not answer.

Does she pay a fee for the inconvenience?

Just the other day, I had to cancel an appointment due to a major scheduling issue on my part. (Long story and totally my fault.) I fired off a text to my date explaining the situation and apologizing (of course). She replied right back saying, no problem, take care of your situation and we'll use this pent up sexual energy for next time. (We'd been texting each other prior to the discovery of my mistake...) No harm no foul, but it was a cancellation, the day of.

Several weeks ago, I had to cancel an appointment due to a family matter on my end. I gave her 3 days notice... I sent her a text immediately when the situation arouse, and waited 6 hours for a reply, before sending another asking for a confirmation this time. (Much like Kyra suggested...) The next day when I STILL hadn't rec'd a reply, I sent her a PM via the board as a last resort. (She previously stated e-mail is not so good for her...). STILL no reply. Then the next day, she finally sent me a text asking if we were still on for the next day. Huh? I think, and go on to explain the situation all over again. She blamed her cell service and sounded a little pissed at me, but sometimes hard to tell with written text. I apologized again, and asked her to contact me again, next time she was in town, and we'll try and hook up. She hasn't.

Similarly, in the last 2 months, I've had 3 cancellations, (2 with explanation BEFORE the appointment, and one AFTER the scheduled appointment) and one additional no show with no explanation what so ever. So who's to compensate me for my time, efforts, and expenses? (gas isn't cheap these days either, and I was driving in from out of town since I don't hobby in my home town...)

Hmmmmmm

 

[Kyra.Graves]

I actually wasn't addressing the issue of what happens when a lady cancels as the variables are different but if the OP had actually cancelled then the situation would be different, he didn't cancel he simply didn't show up and gave her no notice.

If a lady does manage to not show up with no call or notice then most clients do post a review or warning about that which in turn does affect the ladies business. If the lady were to value his business and wish to make it up to him then quite often she will offer some sort of compensation which again is best worked out between the two parties as what is acceptable to one person may or may not be acceptable to another and every lady has a different business model which in fact will alter the outcome as well.
I really didn't address the issue of what happens when a person cancels, a NCNS (No Call No Show) is quite different and in any business isn't taken very well, imagine leaving an important client sitting at a lunch waiting for you and you not only do not show up but do not let them know you are unavailable. Anyone that has worked in sales will tell you that you will spend a good deal of time trying to repair that relationship unless you have a pretty solid reason, short of being in an accident where a phone is out of the question most people expect an email or phone call in advance. We all make mistakes and I am sure we have all made scheduling errors, had messages not go through or simply missed appointments for one reason or another but taking responsibility for that is important and if you value the relationship then you reach out to the individual and see how they are feeling and what they feel is appropriate, from there you decide if it is something you feel comfortable with for your own business/situation. There is no standard compensation for 'wasted time' and 'damaged client relationships' and no one here can say what is appropriate for another person, some people will be satisfied with a simple apology and reschedule and others will be more demanding, you deal with it on a case by case basis.

 

[Kyra.Graves]

Similarly, in the last 2 months, I've had 3 cancellations, (2 with explanation BEFORE the appointment, and one AFTER the scheduled appointment) and one additional no show with no explanation what so ever. So who's to compensate me for my time, efforts, and expenses? (gas isn't cheap these days either, and I was driving in from out of town since I don't hobby in my home town...)

As an aside if it is happening that frequently then you probably need to re-evaluate who you are booking and your booking procedure. I can almost always look at a companions marketing and see if they will be reliable or not but I see it from the other side of the coin, an insiders view if you will. There are ladies that are going to be more reliable than others and there are always clues in their business marketing. If you are drawn to a certain type of person or lifestyle then you may assume a greater risk of cancellation or reschedule, it's simply something that will go along with some people and their choices or where they are in life.

I can generally predict my cancellations both my own and my client ones and will usually reach out to a client about a week or so in advance to let them know that there is a possibility of complications (most commonly weather and flight delays) and ask them if they want to reschedule or if they prefer a more 'constant contact' approach with my assistant (she will be available on phone/email and update you immediately with any flight changes) in the event of my being stuck in an airport. The last minute cancellations; injury, death of friend or family, etc. don't happen that often and in general most people understand that if you spent your last 24hrs sitting in a hospital getting a cast on you probably aren't going to be great company later that evening so they are grateful you are not attempting to 'push through' the date. :wink2:

 

[Mason]

Very well said Kyra.

 

[DannyDeVito]

As an aside if it is happening that frequently then you probably need to re-evaluate who you are booking and your booking procedure. I can almost always look at a companions marketing and see if they will be reliable or not but I see it from the other side of the coin, an insiders view if you will. There are ladies that are going to be more reliable than others and there are always clues in their business marketing. If you are drawn to a certain type of person or lifestyle then you may assume a greater risk of cancellation or reschedule, it's simply something that will go along with some people and their choices or where they are in life.

I can generally predict my cancellations both my own and my client ones and will usually reach out to a client about a week or so in advance to let them know that there is a possibility of complications (most commonly weather and flight delays) and ask them if they want to reschedule or if they prefer a more 'constant contact' approach with my assistant (she will be available on phone/email and update you immediately with any flight changes) in the event of my being stuck in an airport. The last minute cancellations; injury, death of friend or family, etc. don't happen that often and in general most people understand that if you spent your last 24hrs sitting in a hospital getting a cast on you probably aren't going to be great company later that evening so they are grateful you are not attempting to 'push through' the date. :wink2:

Praise-Bowing

 

[Danolo]

Interesting response from you all... thanks..

What I actually did was, I offered to send her some money to compensate her for any loss. She emailed me a way to do that (via email transfer), and I sent her $150.. her original one-hour fee was $220.

I don't know if she had other clients that day, or what her real loss was, but I got a nice thank you email and her indication that we try again to meet in the future.

So, I guess that was an appropriate response to the situation.

I'm not sure how I decided on $150, but it just seemed the right amount.

I'll book her again when I'm in her area and I'm reasonably confident that she'll be happy to see me.

By the way, the error I made in the cancellation email was I hit "Reply" in our email thread to one of MY emails, rather than to her email. It came from a combination of Yahoo mail and my inexperience with my new Mini IPad.

 

[papasmerf]

Interesting response from you all... thanks..

What I actually did was, I offered to send her some money to compensate her for any loss. She emailed me a way to do that (via email transfer), and I sent her $150.. her original one-hour fee was $220.

I don't know if she had other clients that day, or what her real loss was, but I got a nice thank you email and her indication that we try again to meet in the future.

So, I guess that was an appropriate response to the situation.

I'm not sure how I decided on $150, but it just seemed the right amount.

I'll book her again when I'm in her area and I'm reasonably confident that she'll be happy to see me.

By the way, the error I made in the cancellation email was I hit "Reply" in our email thread to one of MY emails, rather than to her email. It came from a combination of Yahoo mail and my inexperience with my new Mini IPad.

Sounds like you did good.

Business is Business and as such maintaining a good relationship is important.

BTW I think you stiffed me for beers a few years ago................say 375 should make us right raying::unknw:

 

[Danolo]

Sounds like you did good.

Business is Business and as such maintaining a good relationship is important.

BTW I think you stiffed me for beers a few years ago................say 375 should make us right raying::unknw:

Hmmm, I stopped drinking a long time ago, so, i doubt I planned a "few beers" with you, however, just in case, I'd be glad to send you $3.75, but the email transfer fee is $1.50, so I'm not sure I can afford that much... :wink2:

Tell you what, I'll buy you a beer or two, the next time we meet at an industry party...:SayWhat?:

 

[papasmerf]

Hmmm, I stopped drinking a long time ago, so, i doubt I planned a "few beers" with you, however, just in case, I'd be glad to send you $3.75, but the email transfer fee is $1.50, so I'm not sure I can afford that much... :wink2:

Tell you what, I'll buy you a beer or two, the next time we meet at an industry party...:SayWhat?:

Back at ya

 

[Falconero]

Interesting response from you all... thanks..

What I actually did was, I offered to send her some money to compensate her for any loss. She emailed me a way to do that (via email transfer), and I sent her $150.. her original one-hour fee was $220.

I don't know if she had other clients that day, or what her real loss was, but I got a nice thank you email and her indication that we try again to meet in the future.

So, I guess that was an appropriate response to the situation.

I'm not sure how I decided on $150, but it just seemed the right amount.

I'll book her again when I'm in her area and I'm reasonably confident that she'll be happy to see me.

By the way, the error I made in the cancellation email was I hit "Reply" in our email thread to one of MY emails, rather than to her email. It came from a combination of Yahoo mail and my inexperience with my new Mini IPad.

Man that is such a classy move. Way too much money if you ask me but if you feel that is your safe mode then Praise-Bowing

 

[User-E]

Hmmm, I stopped drinking a long time ago, so, i doubt I planned a "few beers" with you, however, just in case, I'd be glad to send you $3.75, but the email transfer fee is $1.50, so I'm not sure I can afford that much... :wink2:

Tell you what, I'll buy you a beer or two, the next time we meet at an industry party...:SayWhat?:

Classy move Danolo. /-Thumbs-up::/

Back at ya

Someone else did a 'beer worthy' deed recently. Was it Wanker?

 

[papasmerf]

Classy move Danolo. /-Thumbs-up::/



Someone else did a 'beer worthy' deed recently. Was it Wanker?

no idea

 

[Charcoal]

Classy move Danolo.