Sexual assault is NOT something to joke about. (Trigger Warning: Sexual assault)

[Crimson Angel]

Words cannot describe how angry I was after reading this thread.



To sum it up, a group of heterosexual men claiming how much they enjoy being sexually assaulted, and a well known indy SP replying back saying she enjoys sexually assaulting these men. As if I couldn't possibly imagine most folks on this site would sink any lower after all the sexism, homophobia, and transphobia that's rampant on this forum, lo and behold, this is the lowest I've seen so far.

To those of you who think sexual assault, rape, or any serious crimes like this are funny: GO FUCK YOURSELF. Seriously. The fact that you think such a serious crime is so funny to the point where you'd say you "enjoy being sexually assaulted" proves how disgustingly ignorant you are, because sexual assault is a harsh reality that the majority of women go through in their lives. Most of you heterosexual men have never been sexually assaulted before so you have no right to dictate whether you will truly enjoy it or not, because let me tell you, if you HAVE been sexually assaulted, you will NOT enjoy it.

You don't have to worry about being groped or have your ass slapped by random strangers in subways or public spaces so you can politely shut the fuck up about saying how much you enjoy sexual assault. Let those who have been sexually assaulted speak instead.

It's a cruel and barbaric thing to do, because I'm sure there has been dozens of people browsing this thread who have been sexually assaulted who will cringe at what you guys wrote.

 

[LadyJacklyn]

It is a pretty fucked up way of trying to "flirt". Some people baffle me.

 

[Jessica Rain]

I actually have no words.....

 

[Prick]

This is where I take a stand. How The fuck do any of you know this is true?. Gather your minds ladies and do not speak for others as you are so so wrong.

Most of you heterosexual men have never been sexually assaulted

 

[Prick]

Just wait till that closet case Demien get's to you. I need to butter my popcorn.

 

[Crimson Angel]

Just wait till that closet case Demien get's to you. I need to butter my popcorn.

Oh man I'm so looking forward to this...

 

[Madman]

OMG, the "I'm so offended society" is hard at work!

I'm going to come out of retirement just to book with Hailey and what we do or she does to me behind closed doors in none of your business!

 

[Jessica Rain]

OMG, the "I'm so offended society" is hard at work!

I'm going to come out of retirement just to book with Hailey and what we do or she does to me behind closed doors in none of your business!

Is it understandable that a person who was sexually assaulted may be offended by jokes that are made about it.

DV victims would be the same with beating spouse jokes.

Some races and cultures have issues with racial or culture jokes.

So I get some being offended and I get some not be. I think on a topic like this, some sensitivity and better choice of words is not a lot to ask, is it?

 

[Madman]

Is it understandable that a person who was sexually assaulted may be offended by jokes that are made about it.

DV victims would be the same with beating spouse jokes.

Some races and cultures have issues with racial or culture jokes.

So I get some being offended and I get some not be. I think on a topic like this, some sensitivity and better choice of words is not a lot to ask, is it?

20 years ago when I actually had a cute butt it was grabbed in a bar downtown. The gentleman was obviously gay and decided to grab a handful of Madman goodies. I laughed and told him he grabbed the wrong arse. I left scratching my head but my point is I laughed it off. It is only an arse cheek. I realize there are many degrees of sexual assault but now the slightest touch has become an OMG my life is ruined moment. The pendulum has swung too far and this is what is ruining lives on both sides. I'm of the camp, shake it off and life goes on. It is not healthy to delve on the past and live as a victim because society keeps telling you that you are.

 

[Jessica Rain]

20 years ago when I actually had a cute butt it was grabbed in a bar downtown. The gentleman was obviously gay and decided to grab a handful of Madman goodies. I laughed and told him he grabbed the wrong arse. I left scratching my head but my point is I laughed it off. It is only an arse cheek. I realize there are many degrees of sexual assault but now the slightest touch has become an OMG my life is ruined moment. The pendulum has swung too far and this is what is ruining lives on both sides. I'm of the camp, shake it off and life goes on. It is not healthy to delve on the past and live as a victim because society keeps telling you that you are.

I understand where you are coming from. But maybe you would feel different if that gay guy trapped you in an alley and fucked you in the ass. Raw and rough. Left you battered and bruised.

While you may get past it and become a survivor, no longer a victim, you still may find jokes of rape or sexual assault to be triggering or offensive.

Cant really say since that didn't happen to you. But if I can see your side, maybe you can be open minded enough to see through someone else's eyes.

 

[Crimson Angel]

Having your asscheeks grabbed ONCE at a bar that you didn't mind is nothing compared to the persistent acts of sexual violence done to most women (and some men) and gender non-binary people inside public spaces.

I'm a gender non-binary with a disability and people of my kind experience absurdly high sexual assault rates. Joking about it is fucked up. Heterosexual dudes who have rarely or never experienced true sexual assault have no right to tell us whether they will enjoy it or not unless they experienced through it, and if they did their answers would be they did NOT enjoy it. That's why it's called sexual ASSAULT.

 

[LadyJacklyn]

There are US stats but I think they can be considered as relevant, just to give you an idea. Rape and sexual assault is not exclusive to women.

Millions of men in the United States have been victims of rape.

• As of 1998, 2.78 million men in the U.S. had been victims of attempted or completed rape.
• About 3% of American men—or 1 in 33—have experienced an attempted or completed rape in their lifetime.
• 1 out of every 10 rape victims are male.

This is where I take a stand. How The fuck do any of you know this is true?. Gather your minds ladies and do not speak for others as you are so so wrong.

Most of you heterosexual men have never been sexually assaulted

 

[Jessica Rain]

There are US stats but I think they can be considered as relevant, just to give you an idea. Rape and sexual assault is not exclusive to women.

Millions of men in the United States have been victims of rape.

• As of 1998, 2.78 million men in the U.S. had been victims of attempted or completed rape.
• About 3% of American men—or 1 in 33—have experienced an attempted or completed rape in their lifetime.
• 1 out of every 10 rape victims are male.

2.78 MILLION which one in 10 compared to women so that number multiplies and by a fuck ton

That is fucking scary the amount of people, regardless of gender, are sexually assault.

That is not even getting into the child victims.

I can't wrap my head around it. It is just too much. The pain and suffering of so many people and for what????

 

[Guest]

even being a victim of severe sexual abuse (three will still be in jail by the time i’m old), i do have to agree with madman that it has snowballed and the fake accusations have gone up so much it defeats the purpose for those who need it. i’m not condoning “minor” sexual assaultas something that is okay but it dampens the severity of severe sexual assault cases. just saying, but i’m glad i spoke up before this movement blew up bc for some cases, it does the opposite of its function.

for remarks, i just always ask myself, would i be alright with it if a child of mine had said/done the same? makes it easier when i’m arguing with someone to stay calm bc as i’ve said, nothing gets done with parliament-level screaming chaos!!

 

[Crimson Angel]

I'm sorry that happened to you Muckchelle. I hope those vile fuckers get the punishment that they deserve.

And yeah I agree that false rape accusations can happen like when the accuser reports a bad sex or the accused being "socially awkward" and calls it rape or sexual assault. It's mostly marginalized men (men of colour, low income men, disabled men) and trans women (that transphobes and TERFs like to label as "men") that are not only more likely to be falsely accused, but also more likely to experience sexual assault. Like how Donald Trump scapegoats Mexican men as "rapists".

I'll be honest this is one of the things I fear in relationships, which (aside from other reasons) why I prefer to be single.

However, to me, joking about sexual assault... maybe I'm not the person who appreciate dark jokes, but it really struck a nerve inside me when a person who have most likely never experienced sexual assault in the past were to say that they would enjoy it. No, if you have been sexually assaulted (and that's assuming it is sexual assault and not a falsely accused on with the intention of a fucked up agenda) you would NOT enjoy it.

To be fair I actually considered QueenHailey's response of "I love sexually assaulting you gentlemen" a lot worse than Madman's response. First, she's a well known indy sex worker who should know better than to openly admit to committing a crime. The least she could have done was to say Madman's comment was not funny, or at least, stay quiet about it and not mention how she would enjoy committing a fucking crime. Second, let's say she doesn't understand the seriousness of sexual assault just like most of the clients here. And let's say I'm an average joe client who reads that review and is considering whether to see her or not. I definitely will not, because I prefer to be asked about MY boundaries and whether I am comfortable to do certain things just as much as she does. Respect and consent is a two way street. Both genders should learn about consent and boundaries and respect other people's no's.

If I had someone spat on my private parts without my consent I will most likely consider that as sexual assault, because I have never been asked whether I enjoy a huge fucking wad of saliva on my genitals. It actually happened once (with an SP), and I was actually too afraid to report it. Because of people like Madman or QueenHailey that openly make sexual assault into a laughing matter, and I'm not a cis-gender woman. So I didn't know what to do, and especially as a newcomer hobbyist, I didn't know what was "normal" and what was not in this industry. Is being spat on my genitals the norm? If I were to say I didn't enjoy an activity should I be taken as seriously as if the SP were to say the same thing? I don't fucking know.

 

[queenhailey]

I dont check in here very often but just want to say that it was not in any such way my intention to trigger anybody,and I do sincerely apologize to anyone who feels that way personally

It was meant to be a harmless comeback to another's post

Apologies again folks


Sincerely,
xo Hailey

 

[Crimson Angel]

I dont check in here very often but just want to say that it was not in any such way my intention to trigger anybody,and I do sincerely apologize to anyone who feels that way personally as I can completely understand the lack of consideration.

It was meant to be a harmless comeback to another's post

Apologies again folks


Sincerely,
xo Hailey

Thank you very much for the reply and apology. You are awesome. <3

Guys take note: This is how you respond to threads like this. Not "blah blah blah you guys are sooo sensitive." Apology and understanding why what you said was wrong goes a long way.

 

[queenhailey]

Thank you very much for the reply and apology. You are awesome. <3

Guys take note: This is how you respond to threads like this. Not "blah blah blah you guys are sooo sensitive." Apology and understanding why what you said was wrong goes a long way.

You are most welcome Crimson, Understanding is the key xo

<3

 

[Crimson Angel]

:biggrin2:

 

[The Voice]

On the other forum I go on, that is not this hobby related, they censor out words like rape, molest and so on. This is to ensure people who have suffered aren't inadvertently impacted by seeing those words. I can understand that it is easy to get carried away here, but I'm happy that this thread has brought out some good points and that we have remained civil. Thank you!