Made with Love

Vindication and the reality of aging women....

Anneliese

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 18, 2013
Messages
239
So in recent weeks, I have had an opportunity to ponder much about men, women, beauty and attraction. It has been an interesting view. Consequently, I have personally seen that my unrealistic perceptions of self, and beauty were exactly that... unrealistic. Of course, I am without a doubt an unforgiving perfectionist with the most insane expectations of myself, and I must frequently give myself a reality check.

That has been extremely important for me to do since starting to work in this industry. And particularly since writing on this particularly critical forum. Hence, I find it frequently necessary to leave this place so as not to become completely demoralized.... But I digress... Ultimately, my experience to date has been an interesting experience in paradigm shift. Like many women influenced by the media, I have felt the sting of inadequacy with my aging body.

However, what I saw as a flaw, many men viewed as an asset! Imagine my surprise! I have had multiple men praise, admire and beg me not to alter my age-appropriate, large, natural, post-breast feeding sagging breasts. I was quite frankly shocked! Here I was, awaiting an accumulation of equity so that I could toddle off to my favorite plastic surgeon, and get those babies lifted.... but now I am not so sure...

You see, as women, we often accept without question what the media says or portrays to us about what is beautiful, or sexy or desirable! Why, even several gentlemen on this board have had the audacity to express their narrow-minded opinions of my success or not in this business based on my age and forthright demeanor... and I ALMOST believed them, but thanks to the wisdom and insightful knowledge of my fellow service providers, who have listened, supported and advised me... I have come to a more realistic perspective of my marketability.

Basically, the men on this and other forums like this forum represent a VERY small portion of the market, that the review board men, have a narrow focus and interest in a very restricted type of service provider... and that there is a VAST majority of available, interested men outside this community with interests and desires for women of all shapes, sizes and types including maturity, experience, natural, realistic bodies, bbws,etc .....

In fact one very astute business man said to me, " honey forget about them,(hobbyists) because that is the same sad, sorry dollars swirling around an over-saturated pool of providers.... what you need to market to are outside this community and hence new dollars..." I think he had a valid point....

And thus have I entered a paradigm shift, whereby my critical mind has changed into an acceptance mind and ultimately an appreciative mind.... glorying in my age, imperfect body, and responsive, mature sexuality.... So in many respects, this whole venture and experience has been an excellent means of challenging my negative perceptions of self, and so by meeting and servicing men who love, enjoy and revel in what I perceive as my imperfections, I am humbled, honoured and awed by their lavish appreciation.... and consequently is my sense of self, and acceptance of myself vindicated.

Damn I love my job!
 
Anneliese said:
In fact one very astute business man said to me, " honey forget about them,(hobbyists) because that is the same sad, sorry dollars swirling around an over-saturated pool of providers.... what you need to market to are outside this community and hence new dollars..." I think he had a valid point....!

LMAO......So why put this diatribe on here then?
 
So why bother in here???

Basically, the men on this and other forums like this forum represent a VERY small portion of the market
 
Cooldaddy said:
So why bother in here???

Basically, the men on this and other forums like this forum represent a VERY small portion of the market

So we are to assume that Annliesse is doing a roaring business without any HUBGFE members. Good for her. Maybe
 
I am glad you are back......It is good to have different view points....

I myself had what is called a Mommy Tuck.....Why .....to make me feel Good
about Me....as I was always fit.....until my Fibromylagia.....

I dress like a slob...but I can dress classy but I do not.....
I feel you either like me for me ........I love going shopping
looking at things without the store clerks bugging me.....

Also if a guy ask you out and you smell and sweating like a pig....Not Bacon
then he see the inner you.......Women, well I am still trying to get my
nerve up.......

It you who has to feel good about you.....
 
Blissful said:
Also if a guy ask you out and you smell and sweating like a pig....Not Bacon
then he see the inner you
It you who has to feel good about you.....

I am sorry Bliss, but he has to be desperate if he's asking a girl out if she is smelly and sweating like a pig. Yet I do agree it is important to feel good about yourself or feeling content. That alone should attract others. Yet smelling and sweating like a pig, no thank you.
 
Anneliese said:
" honey forget about them,(hobbyists) because that is the same sad, sorry dollars swirling around an over-saturated pool of providers....

Really? I was hoping for more providers out there.
 
thesun said:
I am sorry Bliss, but he has to be desperate if he's asking a girl out if she is smelly and sweating like a pig. Yet I do agree it is important to feel good about yourself or feeling content. That alone should attract others. Yet smelling and sweating like a pig, no thank you.

:LMAO: I forgot to add at the Gym.....:LMAO:

I would not ask a woman out she was like that too.....:LMAO:
 
Anneliese, a highly intelligent woman with a nursing background can surely make a living using her mind as opposed to her body. I'm not trying to preach or belittle you in any way, I am hoping to assist you in seeing the right path.
 
bazerko said:
Anneliese, a highly intelligent woman with a nursing background can surely make a living using her mind as opposed to her body. I'm not trying to preach or belittle you in any way, I am hoping to assist you in seeing the right path.

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Baz said:
Anneliese, a highly intelligent woman with a nursing background can surely make a living using her mind as opposed to her body. I'm not trying to preach or belittle you in any way, I am hoping to assist you in seeing the right path.

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Sex Workers use their minds AND their luscious bodies...

Sex Workers use their minds AND their luscious bodies...

Baz said:
Anneliese, a highly intelligent woman with a nursing background can surely make a living using her mind as opposed to her body. I'm not trying to preach or belittle you in any way, I am hoping to assist you in seeing the right path.

So what makes you think that I am not using my mind making a living at this work? To be honest with you, my foray into this business has been more of an intellectual and strategic challenge than any nursing job I have had to date. And the fact of the matter is, that I used and abused my body working as a nurse in more ways than I have ever done to date in this work. I have become a militant advocate for sex worker rights, and for the acknowledgement of society that this work has value and a meaningful place as well as being worthy of acceptance and benefits. We are still that Puritanical nation, negating our sexuality, and perceiving it as sinful. The reality is that we are sexual beings, and having and engaging in sex is beneficial to our health and wellbeing. We are meant to engage in sex - FREQUENTLY! And not necessarily in monogamous pairs, although I suspect perhaps briefly while offspring are young, but polygamous the rest of the time....

The ONLY reason the Christian church is militant on monogamous and marriage relationships is as a construct of maintaining the patriarchy.... Heaven forbid a man must parent a child not of his body! (marriage and monogamy is all about assuring the patriarchal male that the offspring of his "wife" are indeed his....)

However, if we just viewed things a little differently... that all children regardless of your body or anothers are valuable and worthy of care and support, that we see sex as a necessary part of liviing and maintaining a healthy body and lifestyle, that we understand that life, love, sex and relationships are far more complex than the simple romantic stories we were told as children.... Perhaps there wouldn't be as much fear, judgement or nastiness abounding.... and the men I service, my fellow service providers and indeed society at large would not be afraid to be open and honest with the interesting, quirky and sometimes downright bizarre aspects of our sexuality.... perhaps acceptance would abound.... But then I am a romantic idealist I will admit....
 
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