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- Jun 7, 2010
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IfYouSeekAmy said:
Have not seen one yet, but I did see Pirates of the Caribbean, I love Lucy, and Brady Bunch porn. The Brady Bunch one made me feel dirty (in a good way).
- Thread starter Stan Lee
- Start date
Have not seen one yet, but I did see Pirates of the Caribbean, I love Lucy, and Brady Bunch porn. The Brady Bunch one made me feel dirty (in a good way).
- Joined
- Sep 14, 2010
- Messages
- 6,934
I can't help it...I'm watching episodes of the old series and feel an urge to write dirty naughty versions
I would enjoy a Sensual Massage.....
I would love to have a woman to enjoy my company...
Both of us on a bed....relaxing....smile....and teasing each
other......No stress, no thoughts....well the only thoughts are
Sweet, Innocent Ones.....Really.....:anangel:
I would love to have a woman to enjoy my company...
Both of us on a bed....relaxing....smile....and teasing each
other......No stress, no thoughts....well the only thoughts are
Sweet, Innocent Ones.....Really.....:anangel:
H
HOF
Guest
60 Dumbest Celebrity Quotes
Famous funny, dumb and stupid celebrity quotes:
[TABLE="class: cms_table"]
[TR]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.»
- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign. One of the worst celebrity quotes ever. [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure.»
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«So, where's the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?»
— Christina Aguilera [/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]
«Fiction writing is great. You can make up almost anything.»
- Ivana Trump, on finishing her first novel
«I'm convinced the Beatles are partly responsible for the fall of Communism.»
- Milos Forman, Film director
«When I'm a blonde, I can say the world is purple, and they'll believe me because they weren't listening to me.»
- Kylie Bax, Model/Actress, in Stuff magazine.
«The internet is a great way to get on the net.»
- Bob Dole, Republican presidential candidate
«You guys, line up alphabetically by height.»
- Bill Peterson, Florida State football coach
«I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada.»
- Britney Spears, on Blender Magazine (April 2004)
«I think war is a dangerous place.»
- George W. Bush, Washington, D.C. (May 7, 2003)
«I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.»
- Greg Norman, Golfer
«It's nice, it gives you a feeling of security so that if something breaks we know we can always call a guy over and he'll bring a drill or something.»
- Brooke Shields, Actress, on why it was is good to live in a co-ed dormitory when she was in college
«Rotarians, be patriotic! Learn to shoot yourself.»
- Gyrator, Chicago Rotary Club journal
«These people haven't seen the last of my face. If I go down, I'm going down standing up.»
- Chuck Person, NBA Basketball player
«I'm so smart now. Everyone's always like 'take your top off'. Sorry, NO! They always want to get that money shot. I'm not stupid.»
- Paris Hilton (December 2003)
[TABLE="class: cms_table"]
[TR]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman»
- Arnold Schwarzenegger [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff.»
- Mariah Carey, pop singer [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«Predictions are difficult. Especially about the future.»
- Yogi Berra, Baseball player [/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]
«My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt.»
- Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice.
«The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century.»
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice-President
«And now the sequence of events in no particular order.»
- Dan Rather, television news anchor
«Natural gas is hemispheric. I like to call it hemispheric in nature because it is a product that we can find in our neighborhoods.»
- George W Bush, Austin, Texas, Dec. 20, 2000
«The doctors X-rayed my head and found nothing.»
- Dizzy Dean, explaining how he felt after being hit on the head by a ball in the 1934 World Series.
«I was in a no-win situation, so I'm glad that I won rather than lost.»
- Frank Bruno, Boxer
«I have opinions of my own --strong opinions-- but I don't always agree with them.»
- George Bush
«I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first.»
- George Rogers, NFL New Orleans Saint RB, when asked about the upcoming season
«I do not like this word "bomb." It is not a bomb. It is a device that is exploding.»
- Jacques le Blanc, French ambassador on nuclear weapons
«The word 'genius' isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.»
- Joe Theisman, quar****ack and sports analyst
«Half this game is ninety percent mental.»
- Danny Ozark, Philadelphia Phillies manager
«Be sure and put some of those neutrons on it.»
- Mike Smith, Baseball pitcher, ordering a salad at a restaurant.
[TABLE="class: cms_table"]
[TR]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«If I sold all my liabilities, I wouldn't own anything. My wife's a liability, my kids are liabilities, and I haven't sold them.»
- Ted Turner, media mogul, on selling off his money losing properties [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«They misunderestimated me.»
- George W Bush, Bentonville, Ark., (Nov. 6, 2000) [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«I don't diet. I just don't eat as much as I'd like to.»
- Linda Evangelista, Supermodel [/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]
«Facts are stupid things.»
- Ronald Reagan, Former U.S. President
«What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is.»
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President
«That's just the tip of the ice cube.»
- Neil Hamilton, BBC2
«A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.»
- Samuel Goldwyn
«I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid.»
- Terry Bradshaw, Former football player/announcer
«It isn't pollution that is hurting the environment, it's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.»
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice-President
«I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.»
- Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.
«The only happy artist is a dead artist, because only then you can't change. After I die, I'll probably come back as a paintbrush.»
- Sylvestor Stallone, Actor
«Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country.»
- Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC
«We are not ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur.»
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President
«Will the highways on the internet become more few?»
- George W Bush, Concord, New Hampshire, (29th January 2000)
«Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas.»
- Keppel Enderbery, Former Australian cabinet minister
[TABLE="class: cms_table"]
[TR]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«There is certainly more in the future now than back in 1964.»
- Roger Daltrey, Singer/Actor [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees.»
- Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«I've never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don’t like eating fish. And I know that's very popular out there in Africa.»
— Britney Spears [/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]
«Pitching is 80% of the game. The other half is hitting and fielding.»
- Mickey Rivers, baseball player
«I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix.»
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President
«Put the 'off' button on.»
- George W. Bush, Associated Press, 14th February 2000
«So Carol, you're a housewife and mother. And have you got any children?»
- Michael Barrymore
«Food is an important part of a balanced diet.»
- Fran Lebowitz, US writer
«We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?»
- Lee Iacocca, Chairman of the Chrysler corporation
«For NASA, space is still a high priority.»
- Dan Quayle
«He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is.»
- Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer
«If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.»
- George Gobel
«If only faces could talk...»
- Pat Summerall, Sportscaster, during the Super Bowl
«Every minute was more exciting than the next.»
- Linda Evans, actress
«I'm not anorexic. I'm from Texas. Are there people from Texas that are anorexic? I've never heard of one. And that includes me.»
— Jessica Simpson
Famous funny, dumb and stupid celebrity quotes:
[TABLE="class: cms_table"]
[TR]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.»
- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign. One of the worst celebrity quotes ever. [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure.»
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«So, where's the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?»
— Christina Aguilera [/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]
«Fiction writing is great. You can make up almost anything.»
- Ivana Trump, on finishing her first novel
«I'm convinced the Beatles are partly responsible for the fall of Communism.»
- Milos Forman, Film director
«When I'm a blonde, I can say the world is purple, and they'll believe me because they weren't listening to me.»
- Kylie Bax, Model/Actress, in Stuff magazine.
«The internet is a great way to get on the net.»
- Bob Dole, Republican presidential candidate
«You guys, line up alphabetically by height.»
- Bill Peterson, Florida State football coach
«I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada.»
- Britney Spears, on Blender Magazine (April 2004)
«I think war is a dangerous place.»
- George W. Bush, Washington, D.C. (May 7, 2003)
«I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.»
- Greg Norman, Golfer
«It's nice, it gives you a feeling of security so that if something breaks we know we can always call a guy over and he'll bring a drill or something.»
- Brooke Shields, Actress, on why it was is good to live in a co-ed dormitory when she was in college
«Rotarians, be patriotic! Learn to shoot yourself.»
- Gyrator, Chicago Rotary Club journal
«These people haven't seen the last of my face. If I go down, I'm going down standing up.»
- Chuck Person, NBA Basketball player
«I'm so smart now. Everyone's always like 'take your top off'. Sorry, NO! They always want to get that money shot. I'm not stupid.»
- Paris Hilton (December 2003)
[TABLE="class: cms_table"]
[TR]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman»
- Arnold Schwarzenegger [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff.»
- Mariah Carey, pop singer [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«Predictions are difficult. Especially about the future.»
- Yogi Berra, Baseball player [/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]
«My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt.»
- Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice.
«The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century.»
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice-President
«And now the sequence of events in no particular order.»
- Dan Rather, television news anchor
«Natural gas is hemispheric. I like to call it hemispheric in nature because it is a product that we can find in our neighborhoods.»
- George W Bush, Austin, Texas, Dec. 20, 2000
«The doctors X-rayed my head and found nothing.»
- Dizzy Dean, explaining how he felt after being hit on the head by a ball in the 1934 World Series.
«I was in a no-win situation, so I'm glad that I won rather than lost.»
- Frank Bruno, Boxer
«I have opinions of my own --strong opinions-- but I don't always agree with them.»
- George Bush
«I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first.»
- George Rogers, NFL New Orleans Saint RB, when asked about the upcoming season
«I do not like this word "bomb." It is not a bomb. It is a device that is exploding.»
- Jacques le Blanc, French ambassador on nuclear weapons
«The word 'genius' isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.»
- Joe Theisman, quar****ack and sports analyst
«Half this game is ninety percent mental.»
- Danny Ozark, Philadelphia Phillies manager
«Be sure and put some of those neutrons on it.»
- Mike Smith, Baseball pitcher, ordering a salad at a restaurant.
[TABLE="class: cms_table"]
[TR]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«If I sold all my liabilities, I wouldn't own anything. My wife's a liability, my kids are liabilities, and I haven't sold them.»
- Ted Turner, media mogul, on selling off his money losing properties [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«They misunderestimated me.»
- George W Bush, Bentonville, Ark., (Nov. 6, 2000) [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«I don't diet. I just don't eat as much as I'd like to.»
- Linda Evangelista, Supermodel [/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]
«Facts are stupid things.»
- Ronald Reagan, Former U.S. President
«What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is.»
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President
«That's just the tip of the ice cube.»
- Neil Hamilton, BBC2
«A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.»
- Samuel Goldwyn
«I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid.»
- Terry Bradshaw, Former football player/announcer
«It isn't pollution that is hurting the environment, it's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.»
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice-President
«I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.»
- Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.
«The only happy artist is a dead artist, because only then you can't change. After I die, I'll probably come back as a paintbrush.»
- Sylvestor Stallone, Actor
«Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country.»
- Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC
«We are not ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur.»
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President
«Will the highways on the internet become more few?»
- George W Bush, Concord, New Hampshire, (29th January 2000)
«Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas.»
- Keppel Enderbery, Former Australian cabinet minister
[TABLE="class: cms_table"]
[TR]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«There is certainly more in the future now than back in 1964.»
- Roger Daltrey, Singer/Actor [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees.»
- Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks [/TD]
[TD="width: 5%"][/TD]
[TD="width: 30%"]
«I've never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don’t like eating fish. And I know that's very popular out there in Africa.»
— Britney Spears [/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]
«Pitching is 80% of the game. The other half is hitting and fielding.»
- Mickey Rivers, baseball player
«I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix.»
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President
«Put the 'off' button on.»
- George W. Bush, Associated Press, 14th February 2000
«So Carol, you're a housewife and mother. And have you got any children?»
- Michael Barrymore
«Food is an important part of a balanced diet.»
- Fran Lebowitz, US writer
«We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?»
- Lee Iacocca, Chairman of the Chrysler corporation
«For NASA, space is still a high priority.»
- Dan Quayle
«He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is.»
- Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer
«If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.»
- George Gobel
«If only faces could talk...»
- Pat Summerall, Sportscaster, during the Super Bowl
«Every minute was more exciting than the next.»
- Linda Evans, actress
«I'm not anorexic. I'm from Texas. Are there people from Texas that are anorexic? I've never heard of one. And that includes me.»
— Jessica Simpson
H
HOF
Guest
H
HOF
Guest
SillyGirl said:
Oh look who's back and stirring the pot already! :wink:
H
HOF
Guest
For the record, it's quite simple.
1. What's on your mind, what are you thinking thread
2. New post anything you want
3. Post things that make you laugh
4. Madman's gratuitous post counter thread
5. a1 Player's gratuitous post count thread
1. What's on your mind, what are you thinking thread
2. New post anything you want
3. Post things that make you laugh
4. Madman's gratuitous post counter thread
5. a1 Player's gratuitous post count thread
H
HOF
Guest
Ha, Ha, Ha, go ahead, put me on ignore, I'll just call you! If you don't answer, I'll call EMS where you are
and tell them you have fallen and can't get up!
Oh yes, before you go there, let me say it for you!
ok, ok, ok!
Damn, I sound Joe Pesci!
HOF,
- Joined
- Sep 14, 2010
- Messages
- 6,934
I wish there were an auto-correct for jackasses on forum boards
Can't believe such simple jabs can bring me to tears long after being posted
Can't believe such simple jabs can bring me to tears long after being posted
J
Jesus Quintana
Guest
I thinking about going to poop, walk my dog, go to the post office and then wash my car.
J
Jesus Quintana
Guest
Cardinal Fang
Reviewer
- Joined
- May 9, 2012
- Messages
- 5,717
Don't worry. There is a place in hell for them. :wink:
Cardinal Fang
Reviewer
- Joined
- May 9, 2012
- Messages
- 5,717
I'm thinking about sex. Yesterday I thought about sex. An hour ago when I woke up with an erection I was thinking about sex and how I was going to pee in that state. It's fair to say that later on today I will be thinking about sex and why I have yet to have any.
I think Molly Robinson broke me.....
I think Molly Robinson broke me.....
Blank_Dave
Reviewer
- Joined
- Jan 6, 2010
- Messages
- 1,780
Well, I'm thinking how yummy Erin @ Select looks right about now, and how Stubby actually agrees. I find myself thinking 'what would I want to do with her...'. Sadly I know full damned well if I booked her I'ld be asking myself 'what am I supposed to do with her?'. And she'd be wondering 'WTF is he trying to do? So I guess it's best to avoid that bit of sexual frustration.
plus I'd have to trim the jungle.
plus I'd have to trim the jungle.
Mother's Day and no phone call from my son.....
So I was thinking of when I was young...and when I was about 8 years old I
heard Elvis Presley Sing Nobody's Child....I always remember that song...
That is how I felt when I was growing up, no attachment to my Mother
and my father treated me as an adult.....I really never was a kid....
Ok....Sad enough.....I thought raising a child with love and understanding
at least I would be a good mom....Maybe when he gets older.....
So I was thinking of when I was young...and when I was about 8 years old I
heard Elvis Presley Sing Nobody's Child....I always remember that song...
That is how I felt when I was growing up, no attachment to my Mother
and my father treated me as an adult.....I really never was a kid....
Ok....Sad enough.....I thought raising a child with love and understanding
at least I would be a good mom....Maybe when he gets older.....
Blank_Dave
Reviewer
- Joined
- Jan 6, 2010
- Messages
- 1,780
Bliss, I get the same feeling when I hear Cat's in the Cradle.
As for me, I'm thinking....
Why do I have so much difficulty enjoying basic things, like sex?
Time for another weight loss push, and break into the 170s.
As for me, I'm thinking....
Why do I have so much difficulty enjoying basic things, like sex?
Time for another weight loss push, and break into the 170s.
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