SerenaPaxton
Well-known member
- Joined
- Nov 30, 2013
- Messages
- 97
- Thread starter SQUISH
- Start date
SerenaPaxton
Well-known member
- Joined
- Nov 30, 2013
- Messages
- 97
I'll do it tomorrow
I can lift this by myself
I haven't slept with that many people/I've slept with TONS of people!
You look great in that dress
That's probably healthy...fries are potatoes. They're vegetables.
I didn't know I was speeding officer
I'm probably beginning to seem a bit pathological...
I can lift this by myself
I haven't slept with that many people/I've slept with TONS of people!
You look great in that dress
That's probably healthy...fries are potatoes. They're vegetables.
I didn't know I was speeding officer
I'm probably beginning to seem a bit pathological...
H
HOF
Guest
All fortune cookies are lies!
H
HOF
Guest
The psychic network & psychic hotline & all psychics are liars.
H
HOF
Guest
That the Toronto Maple Leafs are a good team.:LMAO:
shakeandbake
Reviewer
- Joined
- Jul 28, 2010
- Messages
- 390
My one answer (out of many) would be religion , this is by far the worst thing that we ever created and how people are still willing to believe the nonsense and even worse kill others for this invention is beyond me ....
L
Louis XIV
Guest
Women are the world's greatest lie! LOL! Everything about a woman is nothing more than attempts at deception:
When you look at any woman, you can be sure...
Not her true hair color (dyed)
Not her actual hair for that matter (extensions / weave)
Not her real nails (acrylic)
Not her real eyelashes (falsies)
Not her real height (high heels)
Not her real bust (enhanced)
Not her real skin tone (spray tan)
Not her actual lip color (lipstick)
She don't actually smell that good (perfume)
Not her real eye color (color contact lenses)
Not her true weight (liposuction)
Not her real waistline (corset)
Not her real ass size (spanx)
Pussy ain't really that smooth (wax)
Taint ain't really that pink (bleach)
etc.
Lord, protect us from these evil lying women whom we so love and perpetually lust after....:biggrin2:
When you look at any woman, you can be sure...
Not her true hair color (dyed)
Not her actual hair for that matter (extensions / weave)
Not her real nails (acrylic)
Not her real eyelashes (falsies)
Not her real height (high heels)
Not her real bust (enhanced)
Not her real skin tone (spray tan)
Not her actual lip color (lipstick)
She don't actually smell that good (perfume)
Not her real eye color (color contact lenses)
Not her true weight (liposuction)
Not her real waistline (corset)
Not her real ass size (spanx)
Pussy ain't really that smooth (wax)
Taint ain't really that pink (bleach)
etc.
Lord, protect us from these evil lying women whom we so love and perpetually lust after....:biggrin2:
H
HOF
Guest
There is no GOD so that's a lie.Hmmmmmm:biggrin2:
H
HOF
Guest
Louis XIV said:
Sounds like a Heidi Montag bio!:don'twantto-see:/
L
Louis XIV
Guest
GOD said:
It's mine. guess I was just being kind of a jerk...:Thatwas-bad:
L
Louis XIV
Guest
Sure Hun! You absolutely DID make me cum!
L
Louis XIV
Guest
Guys lie to their women all the time too...
'Of course those jeans don't make your ass look huge honey!'
'No, I couldn't care less you've got a wasteland of cellulite on the back of each thigh. It's cute.'
'Sweetheart, I don't even notice your post-pregnancy stretchmarks during sex anymore...honest!'
'Sure thing, I love going down on you during your period! I just want to ease your cramping!'
'Sex once every 3 months!? No problem babe - I'll never miss it!'
'Of course I don't mind zipping over to the drug store to pick you up some tampons and maxi pads.'
'I'd love to stand in the mall for an hour holding your purse while you shoe shop.'
'No worries, I love being 45mins late for every social occasion we're invited to. I just want to make sure you're happy with what you're wearing before we leave the house.'
'No, I never feel in mortal danger when I let YOU drive on the freeway.'
'Internet porn!? Absolutely NOT!'
'Did I see that hot chick's huge tits as she flounced by at the grocery? Nope...missed that completely.'
'Night out drinking with the boys, or night in to watch The Bachelor with you? Not even close. Fire up the TV baby, can't wait!'
'I'd love to make dinner while you take a nap.'
'No, I never even noticed the $700 hair salon charge on my credit card bill last month. I just want you to feel sexy baby - money is no object.'
'Sure, take MY car anytime you want honey.'
'I'd love for your mother to come live with us now that your dad has finally worked up the courage to dump her miserable ass.'
'No, the cat did not lick that Cheeto before you ate it.'
'I'd love for you to have a bite of my burger now that yours is gone.'
'No, I have no problem at all with you taking $500 from my wallet without asking, or telling me.'
'I have no idea how THAT WOMAN got my cell number or why she is sexting me.'
'Working late tonight babe, be home late.'
'No, the roast was cooked to perfection - not dry at all! GACK!'
'No one noticed your hairy muff poking out of the crotch of your bathing suit today at the beach - it's all in your head.'
'Clitoral chafing from wearing a too small thong is totally normal. Happens to lots of women everyday.'
'Sorry honey, they were all out of Vagisil, and yes, I did ask the female pharmacist if she could help me look.'
'You've had a hard day and want me to rub your feet? Nothing would make me happier.'
'Nope, never even noticed the garlic on your breath from your caesar salad at lunch.'
'Of course I believe you that the light was yellow, not red. No, I don't mind paying your traffic ticket again.'
'I'd love to have another child!'
and the biggest lie of all:
'I love you, baby.' :-Cool/"
'Of course those jeans don't make your ass look huge honey!'
'No, I couldn't care less you've got a wasteland of cellulite on the back of each thigh. It's cute.'
'Sweetheart, I don't even notice your post-pregnancy stretchmarks during sex anymore...honest!'
'Sure thing, I love going down on you during your period! I just want to ease your cramping!'
'Sex once every 3 months!? No problem babe - I'll never miss it!'
'Of course I don't mind zipping over to the drug store to pick you up some tampons and maxi pads.'
'I'd love to stand in the mall for an hour holding your purse while you shoe shop.'
'No worries, I love being 45mins late for every social occasion we're invited to. I just want to make sure you're happy with what you're wearing before we leave the house.'
'No, I never feel in mortal danger when I let YOU drive on the freeway.'
'Internet porn!? Absolutely NOT!'
'Did I see that hot chick's huge tits as she flounced by at the grocery? Nope...missed that completely.'
'Night out drinking with the boys, or night in to watch The Bachelor with you? Not even close. Fire up the TV baby, can't wait!'
'I'd love to make dinner while you take a nap.'
'No, I never even noticed the $700 hair salon charge on my credit card bill last month. I just want you to feel sexy baby - money is no object.'
'Sure, take MY car anytime you want honey.'
'I'd love for your mother to come live with us now that your dad has finally worked up the courage to dump her miserable ass.'
'No, the cat did not lick that Cheeto before you ate it.'
'I'd love for you to have a bite of my burger now that yours is gone.'
'No, I have no problem at all with you taking $500 from my wallet without asking, or telling me.'
'I have no idea how THAT WOMAN got my cell number or why she is sexting me.'
'Working late tonight babe, be home late.'
'No, the roast was cooked to perfection - not dry at all! GACK!'
'No one noticed your hairy muff poking out of the crotch of your bathing suit today at the beach - it's all in your head.'
'Clitoral chafing from wearing a too small thong is totally normal. Happens to lots of women everyday.'
'Sorry honey, they were all out of Vagisil, and yes, I did ask the female pharmacist if she could help me look.'
'You've had a hard day and want me to rub your feet? Nothing would make me happier.'
'Nope, never even noticed the garlic on your breath from your caesar salad at lunch.'
'Of course I believe you that the light was yellow, not red. No, I don't mind paying your traffic ticket again.'
'I'd love to have another child!'
and the biggest lie of all:
'I love you, baby.' :-Cool/"
Similar threads
