Call For Zero Tolerance: Against Women Abuse in this Industry.(Ban together)

[ChaosTheory]

[h=2]#BellLetsTalk[/h]

It's about time we had this discussion, if we have had it before we have to be reminded, as I have been hearing about so many unfortunate situations recently, the most severe was the murder or an escort.

Our Sex workers are continuously being abused both mentally and physically (mild to serious degrees) by clients and that behaviour is being perpetuated because either advocacy is weak or buried in most cases either due to fear, politics or adversely effecting business, who knows he real reason...

...all I know is that we as a community should be made aware, ban together and stop this.
Clients, agency owners and staff, sex workers anyone.
We need an outlet and more so a solution to the problem...unconditionally.

Blacklist, ban, reveal the handles of those abusers, if board members? Agencies deal with the patron swiftly and justly?
It could be happening but we have to know about it in some capacity.
Because ignored only the woman suffers.

Let's interact respectful and responsibly.
I have zero tolerance for abuse as I am sure most of you do.but some don't hence the motivation of this thread.
We all should.​

 

[Madman]

Chaos , it's nice to see we still have good gentlemen within our community.

I believe a big problem is the stigma around sex work created by abolitionists and our political leaders.

If there were no stigma or silly laws focusing on consensual sex , any woman, any agency would come out swinging when a person is hurt in anyway but with today's atmosphere, everyone hides their heads in SHAME and this is WRONG!

 

[Kirk Lazarus]

Good Thread CT.

I'm not familiar with the law from an SP perspective, but wasn't the new law suppose to empower SPs in these situations where they can report the perpetrator without fear of persecution themselves? I may be incorrect with this assumption, but if anyone has more knowledge about this subject, I'd love to hear it.

 

[Madman]

Good Thread CT.

I'm not familiar with the law from an SP perspective, but wasn't the new law suppose to empower SPs in these situations where they can report the perpetrator without fear of persecution themselves? I may be incorrect with this assumption, but if anyone has more knowledge about this subject, I'd love to hear it.

If a lady or agency publicly reports a bad client they are then shunned from the community and their business may suffer along with silly rescue groups descending on the young woman. The stigmatization must end so ladies can work safely with security nearby.

 

[JessieJames]

A fantastic thread ChaosTheory and has actually motivated me to come out of lurker status.

A sexworker still and always has the right to say "no, I'm not comfortable with that", the issue then becomes being able to enforce her limitations.

The easiest solution is a room with 2 or more ladies working together and ideally a very intimidating security person. Unfortunately both these remedies are illegal today.

I personally would love to hear the viewpoints of the people mostly affected by this and this is the sex workers.

 

[CharloteEdwards]

Call For Zero Tolerance: Against Women Abuse in this Industry.(Ban together)

Thank you Chaos. While bill c36 is supposed to protect sex workers let's not forget the issues ladies have to deal with that it can't help them with:

Being verbally abused and degraded during the booking process

Being verbally abused, physically abused, threatened or having boundaries pushed by clients in appts even when we say no

Being verbally abused, threatened and degraded online in social media and especially review boards whether it's from clients making general insults or jokes or targeting individual workers

Stigma for "choosing" this line of work should ladies stand up for themselves and speak out against abusers and harassers

Harassment from potential or ex clients we have refused to book or see again


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Peter Baires]

Great post Chaos! I really don't know the reason why, but lately I'm hearing more complains from SW about abusive customers.
I understand that is hard for them to come forward and make a formal complain du to the stigma that this type of work has. This is unfortunate. Abuse should not be tolerated no matter what.

It is hard to say what would be the best solution to stop this abuse. For once I would say that is the agencies and the indies responsibility to inform us of these abuses. We can not help if we are kept in the dark.

Don't keep it to yourselves. The abuser's handle or contact should be made public in these forums.

 

[User-P]

Thanks CT.

HUBGFE has a zero tolerance policy regarding abusive behaviour towards the ladies on the board and on Twitter.

Report any issues to myself or @HUBGFEreviews if you need help, and we'll do what we can, whether you're an advertiser or not.

 

[Raiden]

Blacklists might help, but in an industry where keeping identities secret is most people's main concern and the ability to hide who you are through technology makes it tough.

Removing the stigma is tough....we live in uptight societies where people love to judge and bring down others.

It's tough to prevent abuse because there's nothing that can really be done until it happens. It's like restraining orders....if the person really wants to get to the other person and hurt them, what can you really do? That piece of paper isn't going to prevent them in the real world.

I don't know what the answer is but I do hope that in time we can find a solution. I don't think any man should ever raise his hand against a woman and I don't think he should abuse her verbally. All we can really control is our own actions. So be good to the ladies, gentlemen.

Great discussion to be had CT an very good post Primo that hits the reality of the situation.

 

[LeeRichards]

Thanks CT.

HUBGFE has a zero tolerance policy regarding abusive behaviour towards the ladies on the board and on Twitter.

Report any issues to myself or @HUBGFEreviews if you need help, and we'll do what we can, whether you're an advertiser or not.

Yes. Love, honor and protect our lovely ladies. !! Respect your fellow perverts. and on occasion make fun of Chaos, Peter and Fang. #mybad

A wise lady said to me two days ago. We are here to be happy not to get stressed ... Top Notch

And Prophet. I need help. Could I find anything using this site that you may describe as "Therapy" ?:wink2:

 

[CharloteEdwards]

My biggest beef with this industry is that we as providers almost have to be involved with social media and review boards to stay relevant, and what gets me down is seeing other women being harassed and belittled day after day across multiple platforms. At first I wanted to say something and stand up for every injustice I saw (that was not warranted) but then the trolls started picking on me and directing their anger to me. Why is it so prevalent? Well more often than not it's ladies sticking up for ladies, and then sometimes regulars sticking up for their ATF. Most of the time the average reader just consumes content, laughs and moves on, and then there's threads about "Where did so and so go?" or "Who do you wish would return to the industry?" It's not surprising there is a short shelf life to Toronto SPs especially when clients can be quite critical and always looking for the next best thing, and trying to make or break a lady with their review. It's something I had never ever considered when getting into this industry. I am glad for the friends and connections I've made, but sometimes I have to disconnect for a while just to avoid feeling awful about what I just read from a review board guy. You guys here can really be part of a greater work of change by recognizing and not tolerating abuse and harassment. The reason negativity and abuse can get so rampant is that often no one, or not the majority stands up to say anything about it, so the lurkers just acquiesce that this is "normal" and par for the course.

While no one expects any clients or friends to listen to us complain or solve our problems it is GREATLY appreciated if:

-you see a guy harassing a woman on social media or a review board and you step up and say something like hey buddy keep your negative opinion to yourself, or don't talk to her like that

vs

totally ignoring what you just read because it doesn't concern you, or worse laughing and turning it into a joke

-if a sex worker you encounter seems a little bit bummed or is trying to move on from a bad previous client experience, have a little empathy, don't assume the worst of her and don't trash her in a review to encourage other men into shaming her as well if they ever had an experience that wasn't 100% perfect

Personally I find these things happen FAR too often, I'm not pointing fingers at anyone here, but a lot of the board readers either read horrible things said against SPs and say nothing sticking their head in the sand, or they join in on the band wagon and try to cut her down as a group.

It's absolutely fine to include accurate details, constructive criticism, and honest complaints, but there's a difference between being objective and trying to belittle a woman or ruin her reputation because your experience wasn't perfect.

 

[oldguyzer]

Absolutely. Zero tolerance, with police charges for those who deserve...

 

[muckin]

Great thread CT, its something that should be discussed; the ladies need to be treated with decency and respect, any client that doesnt should face some kind of consequences.

 

[McGuinty]

Shouldn't the police know about this?.

 

[HOOKED]

Thank you Chaos. While bill c36 is supposed to protect sex workers let's not forget the issues ladies have to deal with that it can't help them with:

Being verbally abused and degraded during the booking process

Being verbally abused, physically abused, threatened or having boundaries pushed by clients in appts even when we say no

Being verbally abused, threatened and degraded online in social media and especially review boards whether it's from clients making general insults or jokes or targeting individual workers

Stigma for "choosing" this line of work should ladies stand up for themselves and speak out against abusers and harassers

Harassment from potential or ex clients we have refused to book or see again


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Charlotte a heart felt and great post. You make some very good points. If both provider and client treat one another with respect the interaction will of course be so much better.

As of releasing names on the internet, this makes me a little nervous because we do not need internet justice. If a wrong has been done, the agency or the authorities should handle it not an internet shaming campaign where innocent folks maybe brought down. I've heard of people using other people's handles when booking, imagine someone booking under your handle, causing a disturbance and then the member being unfairly outed.

 

[Almighty]

Shouldn't the police know about this?.

Again!

 

[Catcher]

Thanks CT, why all the SP love the way you protect them.

 

[diner1]

CT, thanks for posting this.
I hope that I have not treated anyone with disrespect, abuse, or maltreatment.
Sadly, I have on occasion, seen the aftermath of an abuser. It really makes my blood boil.
Keep the conversation going.

 

[dude.love]

How do agencies protect against abuse?

When I was in Mexico City brothel, there was a guy standing outside the room with a gun. I assume it was to protect the girl and not me. Obviously that security can't happen here, but what security measures do agencies take?

 

[Robintheboywonder]

No one should be pressured to do anything they are uncomfortable with and goes beyond the normal service of the SP/Client relationship.

The problem is the stigma and the laws surrounding prostitution and until this changes it is hard to properly protect out ladies.