Corniest, funniest and favorite pick up lines

[Madmax]

Honey, I'm new in this town - dya think I could have directions to your house.

 

[tboy]

I actually tried this once on a hottie in the frozen foods section at loblaws:

You walk up to her and show her your shopping list and point to the last item and say: excuse me, i'm kind of lost here, do you know if I could find this in this aisle?

On the list you write:

soul mate

 

[randygirl]

tboy, did that work? It's so lame that it's charming. It would get a coffee out of me, for sure.

An aboriginal guy to me at the bar where I worked, "Hey, hun...If you ever want a status card, you know where to find me!".

:roll:

 

[a 1 player]

Me: Hi, what's your name?
Her: Jennifer
Me: Great, now I know what to scream when I'm rubbing one out tonight.


Me: Can I buy you a drink?
Her: I have a boyfriend
Me: I have a goldfish
Her: What???
Me: Sorry, I thought we were talking about shit that doesn't matter.

Me: You know, your eyes are a perfect match to my comforter.

 

[LadyRaven]

nice eyes, wanna fuck?

 

[Howiediddot]

Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? [Pull your pockets inside out] Would you like to?

 

[a 1 player]

nice eyes, wanna fuck?

For a woman, I can see about a 90%+ success rate with that line.

 

[LadyRaven]

For a woman, I can see about a 90%+ success rate with that line.

LOL .. well it never fails for me .. hehe

 

[jumpingjackflash]

Hey baby, come ere, come sit on my lap and we can talk about the first thing that "pops" up!

 

[a 1 player]

I actually tried this once on a hottie in the frozen foods section at loblaws:

You walk up to her and show her your shopping list and point to the last item and say: excuse me, i'm kind of lost here, do you know if I could find this in this aisle?

On the list you write:

soul mate

Shit, that is totally something I'd do.

 

[billdong]

I am conducting a field test of how many woman have pierced nipples.

 

[tboy]

tboy, did that work? It's so lame that it's charming. It would get a coffee out of me, for sure.

An aboriginal guy to me at the bar where I worked, "Hey, hun...If you ever want a status card, you know where to find me!".

:roll:

I got a laugh and she said something like, "cute" and walked away......

 

[Rock]

I bet you $20 you're gonna turn me down.

If it doesn't work you are guaranteed a smile.

 

[clintE]

You're like a championship bass, I don't know if I should mount you or eat you.

 

[Brocklee]

I used this line at a girl at campus the other day.

What do you say we go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.

It didn't work.

 

[4tees]

Once went to a bar that had board games and a dictionary on display behind it. When the waitress came to our table to take our order, I said "I'll have a gin and tonic and the dictionary behind the bar." Looking surprised, she brought both over, and then I looked up the word "beautiful" in the dictionary and said "Your picture should be here." It worked fairly well...

 

[Tyrell]

(Use index finger to call someone over then say) I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.

 

[Friend of Greekster]

I better practice this for my move to Woodabreege.

 

[tboy]

or the ever popular:

In a noisy bar:
tickle your cunt with a feather?

WHAT DID YOU SAY???

typical country WEATHER!!!!!

 

[Guido]

I like to use, baby I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hand. Works all the time. The only warning is be ready to duck and run if necessary.