How do you handle a betrayal of trust?

[SillyGirl]

So last week in my office, an argument exploded between two coworkers and it got really ugly. Boss was not there at the time.
I have a friend who used to work in my dept., and later that night I told her about it. I specifically said I didn't want anything I said to be repeated. Supposed friend is pretty close with my boss, and I didn't think it was anyone's place but the two people involved to take this up the ladder.
A couple days later, Friend and Boss met up socially. The next morning there was a department-wide text from Boss saying she was aware of what had happened, everyone has to file a written account of what was said/heard/thought, no one is to talk about this with anyone, etc.
It doesn't take a genius to connect those dots. I asked Boss directly if Friend had said anything and she said no. I didn't believe her, mainly because she did not chastise me for discussing this with Friend, as I would've expected her to if she really didn't know Friend was aware of the issue. She just said no while not looking me in the eye.
I haven't said anything yet to Friend and am not sure what I will say. Her big mouth took something that probably would have blown over and ensured it will end up in Human Resources.
How would you handle this? Clearly I can never tell her anything again that I want kept confidential. Beyond that, would you confront her?

 

[IKilo]

Say nothing, the smart thing to do. Your silence will make her more upset than you saying anything.

 

[papasmerf]

Say nothing but be guarded with what you tell your friend, in the future.

You could also tie MM to her car.

 

[SillyGirl]

How do I multi-quote now?

I see the wisdom in keeping my mouth shut, but then she will think she betrayed me and got away with it. Although I suppose the fact that I won't be driving together or doing lunch with her anymore will be enough to keep her wondering.

There is also the possibility that I'm wrong. One of the people involved had been scheduled off for a few days immediately after the blowout occurred, and she may have been nervous about what kind of reception she was going to get when she came back, so it's possible she called Boss. I guess I need to find out for sure before I do/say anything at all.

I'm not quite sure how to do that when I'm under a strict Gag order, but I'll figure it out. People have a way of saying more than they intend to, and sometimes more can be gleaned by what is not said at all.

I appreciate the input, this whole mess has been really unsettling.

 

[SillyGirl]

You could also tie MM to her car.

I do have a key to her apartment, so maybe he could leave a nice apple pie for her.

 

[BEER]

Nice to see you here again SG, may hang around longer knowing you are here again.

 

[BEER]

MM is a she?.


You could also tie MM to her car.

 

[SillyGirl]

Nice to see you here again SG, may hang around longer knowing you are here again.

Thanks, Beer. It's good to be back.

 

[Admin Hub GFE]

How do I multi-quote now?

With the new version it's a bit different.

To multi-quote you can click the "quote" on every post you want to quote and then there's a teal button "post reply" on the left top corner of the thread. When you press it, all quotes fall into the message box for sending.

I believe, the best would be to move that button to the bottom and call "add all quotes" instead.

 

[Admin Hub GFE]

Multiple quotes.

Nice to see you here again SG, may hang around longer knowing you are here again.

Thanks, Beer. It's good to be back.

With the new version it's a bit different.

To multi-quote you can click the "quote" on every post you want to quote and then there's a teal button "post reply" on the left top corner of the thread. When you press it, all quotes fall into the message box for sending.

I believe, the best would be to move that button to the bottom and call "add all quotes" instead.

 

[SillyGirl]

With the new version it's a bit different.

To multi-quote you can click the "quote" on every post you want to quote and then there's a teal button "post reply" on the left top corner of the thread. When you press it, all quotes fall into the message box for sending.

I believe, the best would be to move that button to the bottom and call "add all quotes" instead.

Thanks! I appreciate the help. Techno-dinosaurs such as myself don't have an easy time with change. :blush2:

 

[Admin Hub GFE]

Thanks! I appreciate the help. Techno-dinosaurs such as myself don't have an easy time with change. :blush2:

I appreciate the help, too!

I hope our members have a bit more patience for all things to get normal.
I am walking around and collecting everything that members consider inconvenient and make a list to go through step by step.

 

[SillyGirl]

I appreciate the help, too!

I hope our members have a bit more patience for all things to get normal.
I am walking around and collecting everything that members consider inconvenient and make a list to go through step by step.

I'm still having the issue on the Account page. When I click Save Changes, an error box pops up telling me I'm not allowed to ignore a mod/admin. I'm finding this confusing because I wasn't trying to Ignore anyone.

 

[SillyGirl]

It's apparently not saving my changes, I don't see the signature I just put in.

 

[SirPaul]

Bake some hash brownies and put her on her desk. That should fix her.

 

[SillyGirl]

Bake some hash brownies and put her on her desk. That should fix her.

I'm pretty sure there are security cameras in her dept. Also, I'm not so angry that I want her to lose her job. Also, I would not want to waste good drugs.
The thought does make me chuckle, though. ancing:

 

[Admin Hub GFE]

I'm still having the issue on the Account page. When I click Save Changes, an error box pops up telling me I'm not allowed to ignore a mod/admin. I'm finding this confusing because I wasn't trying to Ignore anyone.

Noted, thanks

 

[IFUSEEKAMY]

Better to say something to her now than let it fester. Don’t be accusational. Just ask her how she thinks the boss found out. I’m confident you’ll be able to tell if she is lying to you or not. Maybe she will do the right thing and fess up.

 

[IFUSEEKAMY]

Where the eff did my apostrophes go?

 

[Benito_775]

You don't handle betrayal and trust. It handles you, like others have said. Do and say nada, they will come crawling for your attention.