How do you handle a betrayal of trust?

[SillyGirl]

Better to say something to her now than let it fester. Don’t be accusational. Just ask her how she thinks the boss found out. I’m confident you’ll be able to tell if she is lying to you or not. Maybe she will do the right thing and fess up.

If I say anything at all, I will just tell her that before I submit my written statement I would like to know what she said to Boss. Like I already know for a fact that she talked.

You don't handle betrayal and trust. It handles you, like others have said. Do and say nada, they will come crawling for your attention.

But then how do I explain why I am suddenly not hanging out with her? This is someone I've been pretty close to for several years now. I suppose there's the chance she won't ask because she's afraid she already knows the answer.

I really wish I had just kept my own mouth shut. Like I will about everything from now on.

 

[IFUSEEKAMY]

That really sucks

 

[Dier]

If I say anything at all, I will just tell her that before I submit my written statement I would like to know what she said to Boss. Like I already know for a fact that she talked.



But then how do I explain why I am suddenly not hanging out with her? This is someone I've been pretty close to for several years now. I suppose there's the chance she won't ask because she's afraid she already knows the answer.

I really wish I had just kept my own mouth shut. Like I will about everything from now on.

No, don't quit and give them that satisfactory. You don't need to know what she said to the boss, it's obvious.

My father always used to say It's easier to forgive an enemy than a friend. You can't blame yourself for trusting, without it you can't live. Deception can never ruin who you are and never change you.

Hope that makes sense.

 

[SillyGirl]

No, don't quit and give them that satisfactory. You don't need to know what she said to the boss, it's obvious.

My father always used to say It's easier to forgive an enemy than a friend. You can't blame yourself for trusting, without it you can't live. Deception can never ruin who you are and never change you.

Hope that makes sense.

I'm not submitting my resignation. Everyone who was there is being required to do a written statement detailing everything that happened. I'm trying to keep mine as minimal as possible.

Your father was very wise.

 

[Oakley]

May I ask what kind of working field you are at?.

 

[What A Wookie]

It's apparently not saving my changes, I don't see the signature I just put in.

Double check your user settings. There is a box to see signatures. Mine was set off.

 

[SillyGirl]

May I ask what kind of working field you are at?.

I'd rather not say. I'm pretty sure my employer would consider being here as "moral turpitude", and I need my job.

Double check your user settings. There is a box to see signatures. Mine was set off.

That's what I was trying to do last night when I kept getting the error box. Antares must've fixed it (thank you!) cause I can see my sig now.

 

[SillyGirl]

oops, I was mistaken. Weirdly, I can see my sig when I'm not logged in but not when I am. Just tried again to Save Changes and I'm still getting the error box.

 

[Coke]

I would not want to waste good drugs.

:LMAO::LMAO::LMAO:

 

[SillyGirl]

You can look at it as a "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me". You trusted....they fucked up (if you're sure)...so you never tell them anything in confidence again.

Personally, I cut ties with people who've lost my trust. But mine were for things that were more severe than passing on info they weren't supposed to. Perhaps your friend didn't register the seriousness of the situation or maybe the boss started grilling and he/she freaked. You might want to talk to the friend before deciding.

I can only think of one other person who might have blabbed. I think I'm gonna ask her if she did.

If she didn't, then I'll know for sure who did.

If I just leave it alone and don't find out for sure, I'll always be wondering if this woman I've considered one of my best friends for years can be trusted. Hard to maintain a real friendship when that's in the back of your mind.

 

[Desire Evaline]

I have had a number of "betrayal of trust" situations. I have done the following:

Said nothing - This is okay if it is not a disclosure of personal information. Friendship stays but trust is broken.
I never did confront the person giving out my HOME ADDRESS INFORMATION to clients I had never met. I may be a little bitter about it... But I learned some valuable life lessons. LOL!

Said something - this results in a loss of friendship over 75% of the time.

You are kind of damned if you do, and damned if you don't hun.I could lie and say this is something your friendship can weather but I am not sure that it will.

 

[SillyGirl]

I have had a number of "betrayal of trust" situations. I have done the following:

Said nothing - This is okay if it is not a disclosure of personal information. Friendship stays but trust is broken.
I never did confront the person giving out my HOME ADDRESS INFORMATION to clients I had never met. I may be a little bitter about it... But I learned some valuable life lessons. LOL!

Said something - this results in a loss of friendship over 75% of the time.

You are kind of damned if you do, and damned if you don't hun.I could lie and say this is something your friendship can weather but I am not sure that it will.

sigh...It's just so damn aggravating. The two people involved in the initial argument appear to have gotten over it, there's no tension in the office. The whole thing would've been over, instead of being on its way upstairs.
I've seen Friend a couple of times, haven't said anything yet. I'm going to first ask the other woman if she said anything. I'm hoping she did.
Welcome back! :girlkiss:

 

[Desire Evaline]

sigh...It's just so damn aggravating. The two people involved in the initial argument appear to have gotten over it, there's no tension in the office. The whole thing would've been over, instead of being on its way upstairs.
I've seen Friend a couple of times, haven't said anything yet. I'm going to first ask the other woman if she said anything. I'm hoping she did.
Welcome back! :girlkiss:

Thank you for the welcome back my lovely friend! :girlkiss:

I hope it was the other woman also. That would be so much better!!!

 

[Dier]

Two smart women I wouldn't mind having a duo with :blush2:

 

[LarryB]

Update?.

 

[Admin Hub GFE]

oops, I was mistaken. Weirdly, I can see my sig when I'm not logged in but not when I am. Just tried again to Save Changes and I'm still getting the error box.

SillyGirl, the "ignore moderator" issue was fixed.
Thanks a lot for your input!

 

[SillyGirl]

SillyGirl, the "ignore moderator" issue was fixed.
Thanks a lot for your input!

Thank you!

 

[SillyGirl]

Update?.

I haven't had a chance to ask the other lady yet.
Friend has been in my department a few times and I've ignored her completely. I'm not sure if she realizes I was ignoring her or if she thought I was just busy.
I was busy, but before all this I would've looked up to say hello. I guess she knows that, and she knows me, so she probably knows exactly what my silence means.

 

[SillyGirl]

 

[SillyGirl]

It's such a very good thing I kept my bitchy mouth shut. I was wrong, it wasn't Friend who talked.

I realized it for sure yesterday. It's a relief! ancing: