Years ago, I used to share a two bedroom flat with another guy who had serious drinking problems at the time.
One night he was drunk, and ordered pizza. He picked up a slice from the box by the crust, without supporting the bottom of the crust, and, of course, all of the topping slipped off, and landed on the floor.
Being drunk, and since the toppings had been on the floor less than five seconds, he picked up the toppings, put them back on the pizza slice, and did the same thing, holding the crust end, unsupported, and once again the toppings fell on the floor.
A sober man would have written it off, and picked up a fresh slice, but he did the same thing two more times, before picking the toppings up, off the floor, and putting them directly into his mouth.
At that point, I said "Y'know, XXXXX, those pizza toppings fell on exactly the same spot where the cat's ass is, then you scratch his ears.".
He looked at me, with his head cocked a bit to one side, and said "Whuhhhh???".
I could see that he was in no mood for conversation, so I just watched the game, and waited until he got hungry again.
He'd had way too much to drink, so, to be kind, I didn't tell him the next day, what he'd done the night before.
It was the least I could do.
