bobistheowl
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bobistheowl
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Rina Piccolo
is a Toronto native cartoonist, now working in New York City. Her daily strip Tina's Groove appears in The Toronto Star. I think she's about five feet tall, and about 80 pounds, soaking wet, and she loves to laugh at her own cartoons.
Rina Piccolo
is a Toronto native cartoonist, now working in New York City. Her daily strip Tina's Groove appears in The Toronto Star. I think she's about five feet tall, and about 80 pounds, soaking wet, and she loves to laugh at her own cartoons.
bobistheowl
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bobistheowl
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INAPPROPRIATE JOKES ~FOR MEN ONLY~
A guy gets a call from the police telling him that his house was robbed.
The offenders had also consumed all of his beer and raped his wife.
A moment of silence passes, then the guy says, “I can’t believe they fucked my wife after only five beers!”
~ ~ ~
Got this text from my brother recently. It read:
“Can I stay at your house for a while? The ol’ lady kicked me out after she caught me measuring my dick. For what it’s worth, it reaches all the way to the back of her sister’s throat!”
~ ~ ~
I was banging this nice lady on her kitchen table when we heard the front door open.
She said, “It’s my husband! Quick, try the back door!”
Thinking back, I really should have ran, but you don’t get offers like that every day.
~ ~ ~
The missus asked me, “When you’re on a boys only trip, do you think about me?”
Apparently “Only to stop myself from coming too quickly” wasn’t the right answer.
~ ~ ~
A guy gets a call from the police telling him that his house was robbed.
The offenders had also consumed all of his beer and raped his wife.
A moment of silence passes, then the guy says, “I can’t believe they fucked my wife after only five beers!”
~ ~ ~
Got this text from my brother recently. It read:
“Can I stay at your house for a while? The ol’ lady kicked me out after she caught me measuring my dick. For what it’s worth, it reaches all the way to the back of her sister’s throat!”
~ ~ ~
I was banging this nice lady on her kitchen table when we heard the front door open.
She said, “It’s my husband! Quick, try the back door!”
Thinking back, I really should have ran, but you don’t get offers like that every day.
~ ~ ~
The missus asked me, “When you’re on a boys only trip, do you think about me?”
Apparently “Only to stop myself from coming too quickly” wasn’t the right answer.
~ ~ ~
bobistheowl
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I guy is driving near Rexdale Blvd. and highway 427, looking for the shopping mall. He sees a guy walking along the side of the highway, and the driver pulls over, and says to the walking guy "Excuse me, could you give me directions to the Woodbine Centre?". The other guy tells him to turn left at the next set of lights, turn right just past the billboard with the underwear ad, drive about a mile north, and turn left on the road with the mailbox sticking out of a milk pail, and he'll find it on that road.
The driver follows the directions, and ends up at a rundown farm house, with rusting old pickup trucks in the yard. He sees a guy sitting on the porch, and says to him "Excuse me, I'm looking for the Woodbine Centre. A guy told me that it's around here somewhere.". They guy on the porch says "You found it. How many cords do you want?".
The driver follows the directions, and ends up at a rundown farm house, with rusting old pickup trucks in the yard. He sees a guy sitting on the porch, and says to him "Excuse me, I'm looking for the Woodbine Centre. A guy told me that it's around here somewhere.". They guy on the porch says "You found it. How many cords do you want?".
bobistheowl
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bobistheowl
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Andre-Philippe Gagnon's first US Television appearance on The Tonight Show starring Johnny Carson, 1987.
Andre-Philippe is a mimic impressionist, usually doing the voices, facial expressions, and mannerisms of well known singers. In this Tonight Show appearance, A-P G performed as Joe Cocker, David Lee Roth, and the entire cast of USA for Africa performing We Are The World, still his signature performance. On another talk show from the same period, probably 'NBC Letterman', he did Mick Jagger and David Bowie doing Dancing in the Street,instead of either Cocker or Roth.
We don't hear much about him anymore, but he hasn't fallen off the map; he just has steady gigs in and around Las Vegas, and his contractual terms may prevent him from doing television appearances, so you have to gamble money, if you want to see him.
This is one of my favorite television moments. I'm glad someone had the foresight to preserve this for those not privileged to have seen it in its sole television broadcast.
Andre-Philippe is a mimic impressionist, usually doing the voices, facial expressions, and mannerisms of well known singers. In this Tonight Show appearance, A-P G performed as Joe Cocker, David Lee Roth, and the entire cast of USA for Africa performing We Are The World, still his signature performance. On another talk show from the same period, probably 'NBC Letterman', he did Mick Jagger and David Bowie doing Dancing in the Street,instead of either Cocker or Roth.
We don't hear much about him anymore, but he hasn't fallen off the map; he just has steady gigs in and around Las Vegas, and his contractual terms may prevent him from doing television appearances, so you have to gamble money, if you want to see him.
This is one of my favorite television moments. I'm glad someone had the foresight to preserve this for those not privileged to have seen it in its sole television broadcast.
bobistheowl
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One of my old jokes:
Bruce Springsteen's intro to Mary Had a Little Lamb, in concert:
"Back home, back home in, uh, like, Asbury Park, y'know, there was, like, this one girl. And her name, see, was Mary. And now Mary, she like, she like, she like had this, this, this, lamb, y'now? Didn't she Steve?..."
More fun with The Boss
I still have a copy of this 1982 picture sleeve vinyl 45, but I don't have anything to play it on.
The B side, Take Me Out to the Ballgame, is also on YouTube, but also with a static image video.
This was a one shot recording by some guys who worked in a radio station somewhere. They didn't have an album, and MTV hadn't started yet. Chances are, no one knows what these guys even look like, other than each other.
This is so pre Born in the USA Bruce, it's uncanny.
Bruce Springsteen's intro to Mary Had a Little Lamb, in concert:
"Back home, back home in, uh, like, Asbury Park, y'know, there was, like, this one girl. And her name, see, was Mary. And now Mary, she like, she like, she like had this, this, this, lamb, y'now? Didn't she Steve?..."
More fun with The Boss
I still have a copy of this 1982 picture sleeve vinyl 45, but I don't have anything to play it on.
The B side, Take Me Out to the Ballgame, is also on YouTube, but also with a static image video.
This was a one shot recording by some guys who worked in a radio station somewhere. They didn't have an album, and MTV hadn't started yet. Chances are, no one knows what these guys even look like, other than each other.
This is so pre Born in the USA Bruce, it's uncanny.
Pullmyfinger
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The Gay Cowboy
A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.
Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk.
She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk.
He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching.
For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well
Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, "You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels." The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night.
One o'clock came, however, and he didn't return.
Two o'clock and no hired hand.
Finally he returned around two-thirty, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him.
She quietly called him over to her.
"Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said.
Trembling, he did as she directed. "Now take off my boots."
He did as she asked, ever so slowly. "Now take off my socks."
He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.
"Now take off my skirt."
He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.
"Now take off my bra." Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.
Then she looked at him and said, "If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you're fired."
A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.
Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk.
She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk.
He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching.
For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well
Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, "You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels." The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night.
One o'clock came, however, and he didn't return.
Two o'clock and no hired hand.
Finally he returned around two-thirty, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him.
She quietly called him over to her.
"Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said.
Trembling, he did as she directed. "Now take off my boots."
He did as she asked, ever so slowly. "Now take off my socks."
He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.
"Now take off my skirt."
He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.
"Now take off my bra." Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.
Then she looked at him and said, "If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you're fired."
bobistheowl
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legoguyzer
bobistheowl
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papasmerf and oldguyzer singing a duet version of Kung Fu Fighting.
bobistheowl
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Most pictures of extraordinary individuals who made an excellent living from performing in traveling carnivals during less enlightened ages do not provoke laughter. This is an exception.
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