Lou Siffer said:
In a hoarse, pained voice... "Call 911".
Then I fake a mild heart attack.
It's really funny! Trust me.
Depending on the woman, and if it's not our first time, I'll often rub my left arm and say, "Ohh, it feels numb." and just let the statement hang. It's a little more subtle, but when it registers with the woman I like the results better.
Generally, I try not to talk and just snuggle for a bit. Usually I'm secretly trying to remember where I flung the tied off condom(s), wanting to pee and wash my genitals, smoke, and then sleep. Maybe thinking of the leftovers depending on how much of an appetite I worked up. That's not hate on women, that's just me being a guy.
edit: I know it's not strictly necessary to fling tied off used condoms or the odd tampon-- but hey it's usually in my own place and I clean. I once got a blood stain on the ceiling and then rubbed the paint off and had to touch up the spot. That's why I love a woman with a menstrual cup (Diva or Keeper). Blood tends to bother women more than me, but with a menstrual cup, especially when you cut the grab handle down, there's no blood and a woman is fine to eat, and she still gets good and wet so you can slip your tip in anyway. I won't go near a pad snatch, but tampons are workable and flingable.
edit: Would suggest a menstrual cup to all women. Saves a fortune even in the short term. Cleans easy. if you cut the grab handle down make sure you round it a bit. Keeps a kitty fun for play. (For those not in the know, think of a rubber shot glass with a handle at the bottom.) I've had women suggest that Diva and Keeper (Dominant companies that make menstrual cups) should pay me a commission.
