What Motivates A Woman To Do This...?

[JackCooper]

Seriously -

A woman I had a relationship with several years ago, has now told me that she is going to confess to her husband that her and I slept together. She tells me this because she is saying that she is going to tell him that we only slept together once, while they were separated, and wants me to back this story up if he confronts me.

I can appreciate someone feeling the need to confess a past indiscretion, but what is the motivation behind a half-hearted (at best) confession that brings to light the relationship but downplays it to this degree? I'm not saying that she should boast about all the times we were together, or go into the sordid details about her infidelity, but why mention it at all unless the intention was to really clear the slate?

Did I mention that this is the wife of my cousin?

​

 

[Senor Gomes]

Amigo, ever heard the expression.


Don't shit where you eat?.

 

[Bubba]

Dude, you are fucked. You better move to another country, once he finds out YIKES :no:

 

[Raiden]

That's why it's easier to pay and play. No strings, no headaches, just walk away!!

 

[-b]

She feels some guilt but no enough........OMG..........
How big is her husband?
If I were you, remind her what holidays will be like with the whole family together..........:neutral:

 

[tboy]

I have to semi agree with bliss here: she feels guilty over the situation. Most people who have a need to confess are only doing it for themselves and are extremely selfish. They'll hurt the other person for no good reason.

 

[Daredevil]

She is using you, stay away.

AGAIN

Stay away, you mean nothing to her, you are just a tool.

 

[Kyra.Graves]

There is also the possibility that she believes he will find out and is trying to come forward with a partial truth in order to prevent him from digging into the story. If she continuously slept with her husbands relative it might be the final straw for their marriage but a one time drunken (or teary, angry, etc.) encounter when they were separated might be something he would be willing to work through with his wife.

 

[Turbo00]

but a one time drunken (or teary, angry, etc.) encounter when they were separated might be something he would be willing to work through with his wife.

Do you think he will buy that story?. I would not, my thinking is that she used him. Mind you, so did he. But looks to me that she wants a way out.

 

[Maurice Boscorelli]

Tell her that you are going to tell him the entire truth if she comes forth with her partial version of the events.

That will put a monkey wrench into her plans and give her a good excuse to suppress her guilty feelings.

 

[Kyra.Graves]

Do you think he will buy that story?. I would not, my thinking is that she used him. Mind you, so did he. But looks to me that she wants a way out.

It doesn't matter what I believe or what you, the OP or the husband believes, the OP asked is what could she possibly be thinking and it is possible that she believes in confessing to a 'lesser crime' will get her off the hook.

 

[tboy]

It doesn't matter what I believe or what you, the OP or the husband believes, the OP asked is what could she possibly be thinking and it is possible that she believes in confessing to a 'lesser crime' will get her off the hook.

That's true, but by not saying anything she's not even ON the hook.......

 

[SillyGirl]

There is also the possibility that she believes he will find out and is trying to come forward with a partial truth in order to prevent him from digging into the story. If she continuously slept with her husbands relative it might be the final straw for their marriage but a one time drunken (or teary, angry, etc.) encounter when they were separated might be something he would be willing to work through with his wife.

+1.

Whatever her motivation, family get-togethers are about to get very, very awkward.

 

[Auggie]

Tell her you'll back up her story if you get one last fuck with her, arty:then work the double standard.

Nobody will blame you, she'll get all the shit because guys are expected to be sluts and women can't get away with it. :he:

 

[007]

Tell her you'll back up her story if you get one last fuck with her, arty:

Include anal play and a gang bang :666:

 

[-b]

Just be honest with her, tell her what you want.......If she is going to be dishonest about telling him then what will she say.....that you took advantage of her.......etc.....Sit her down, talk to her.... in a moment of quilt, the out come can destroy love ones......

 

[tboy]

In a moment of quilt? Is that a handmade one stitched together by little old ladies during a quilting bee?

 

[Jesus Quintana]

Quilting takes a long time. Its never just a moment.

 

[catherine st.claire]

I believe these types of confessions are selfish at their very core. Her actions were hurtful and telling him a half truth to allieviate her guilt is strictly for her own benefit. Intuitively, her husband will know she is lying; he just won't know which part isn't true. OP, if she isn't going to come completely clean, don't back her up. Why does she get the right to clear her conscience and destroy other people in the process, without actually clearing the slate. I call bullshit on this, tell her to come completely clean or S.T.F.U. Self centered as she is, she needs to have a little compassion for this man she is married to by dealing with her shit herself without including anyone else.

cat

 

[tboy]

^^^^^ +100