Made with Love

Just bad jokes thread.

duncan+frank+van.jpg
 
Reporter: “Excuse me, may I interview you?”
Man: “Yes!”
Reporter: “Name?”
Man: “Abdul Al-Rhazim.”
Reporter: “Sex?”
Man: “Three to five times a week.”
Reporter: “No no! I mean male or female?”
Man: “Yes, male, female… sometimes camel.”
Reporter: “Holy cow!”
Man: “Yes, cow, sheep… animals in general.”
Reporter: “But isn’t that hostile?”
Man: “Yes, horse style, dog style, any style.”
Reporter: “Oh dear!”
Man: “No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch.”
 
A woman places an ad in the local newspaper. “Looking for a man with three qualifications: won’t beat me up, won’t run away from me, and is great in bed.” Two days later her doorbell rings. “Hi, I’m Tim. I have no arms so I won’t beat you, and no legs so I won’t run away.”

“What makes you think you are great in bed?” the woman retorts. Tim replies, “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”
 
Back in high school:

Bitchy Girl: you better not hit me. My friend: Don’t worry. I hate animal abuse.
 
A family is on vacation and they stop at a hotel for the night. The dad goes in to the front office to check in, and tells the check-in guy, "I'm here with my wife and kids...so I hope the porn is disabled."

The check-in guy says, "No, it's just regular porn, you sick fuck!"
 
What’s the best thing about fingering a gypsy on her period?

You get your palm red for free
 
Three tampons are sitting at a bus stop. What do they say to each other?

Nothing. They’re stuck up cunts.
 
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