bobistheowl
BANNED
- Joined
- Oct 14, 2014
- Messages
- 1,935
Q: Hey bob! I was reading an Escort's ad, and she didn't give her measurements, but she said she's "size 16". How big is that? - Randy, Vaughn
A: An Escort's advertised dress size is the size she plans to be at the end of Dieting Season, (January 2 until the Thursday before May 2-4 weekend, 'because it doesn't matter in the winter'), minus 2, so she would be a size 18 during Daylight Savings Time, and a size 20 when we're on Standard time.
Q: So she's fat?
A: Kinda, yeah. sure.
Q: So how big is a real size 16?
A: I don't know. They won't tell us. Book with another Escort who claims to be a size 14 next summer, or one who claims to be size twelve between Christmas and New Years, and let the rest of us know.
Q: bob, i seen this add for the b & s azian agency add. The guy on the phone said it's all janapese university student and college modos. I don't now what a modo is, but i think he means model. he says its $60 four full service and all you can eat buffay, and $40 for MSG. are you going and check them out and do you think thats a good deal/ - Josh, Burlington
A: No, I prefer quality over Kwon-titty, and only a fool would pay forty bucks for monosodium glutimate.
Q: What does it mean when an Escort describes herself as 'experienced' in her ad? - Phil, Ajax
A: It means she has a C Section scar.
Q: Why do women have so many pairs of shoes? - Manmeet, Brampton
A: Because none of the shoes fit, but they'll allow each pair to hurt their feet once.
Q: I do not understand. Why would they buy shoes that do not fit?
A: Because truly fashionable shoes are only manufactured in sizes 2-5, and 99.7% of women over the age of 21 have feet sized 6 or larger.
Q: Size 5 feet? Who has feet that small?
A: Ariana Grande.
Q: So why do they buy shoes that do not fit?
A: Because Cinderella had little tiny feet that could fit the glass slipper, and she was beautiful, and the prince married her and she got to live in Barbie's Dream House. Her wicked step sisters all had big feet, and they ended up doing her housework. If a woman can cram her foot into a shoe two or three sizes too small, if only for a few hours, it means she has a beautiful face, at least until midnight, when she turns back into a pumpkin. Or something like that. I was really young when my older sister explained that.
Q: But why does the shoe company make the shoes so small? Surely they would sell more, if they made them in larger sizes?
A: No they wouldn't. Keep in mind that the manufacturer is only interested in one thing: Selling shoes. He doesn't care if anyone wears the shoes once they're sold. In fact, he doesn't want anyone who buys the shoes to wear them more than once. He just wants women with regular sized feet to buy a new pair of shoes every time they go out. If women could wear a pair of shoes more than once, the manufacturer would lose a sale for each time the shoes are reused.
It's a little known fact, but women who have feet sized five or less, and are judged to be 8.5 or higher by the sales clerk, don't pay for their shoes; they receive them free, in exchange for wearing them in public. If the woman is a 9.2 or higher, she will receive the shoes for free, and be paid to wear them. Anytime you see a megahottie in Yorkville on a weekday afternoon carrying several trendy shopping bags, chances are, she's receiving sponsorship money from each bag, just like a racing car driver.
Q: Then why do they keep the shoes, if they can't wear them again?
A: To impress their friends, who peek in their closet while they're powdering their noses.
Q; OK, thanks!
A: An Escort's advertised dress size is the size she plans to be at the end of Dieting Season, (January 2 until the Thursday before May 2-4 weekend, 'because it doesn't matter in the winter'), minus 2, so she would be a size 18 during Daylight Savings Time, and a size 20 when we're on Standard time.
Q: So she's fat?
A: Kinda, yeah. sure.
Q: So how big is a real size 16?
A: I don't know. They won't tell us. Book with another Escort who claims to be a size 14 next summer, or one who claims to be size twelve between Christmas and New Years, and let the rest of us know.
Q: bob, i seen this add for the b & s azian agency add. The guy on the phone said it's all janapese university student and college modos. I don't now what a modo is, but i think he means model. he says its $60 four full service and all you can eat buffay, and $40 for MSG. are you going and check them out and do you think thats a good deal/ - Josh, Burlington
A: No, I prefer quality over Kwon-titty, and only a fool would pay forty bucks for monosodium glutimate.
Q: What does it mean when an Escort describes herself as 'experienced' in her ad? - Phil, Ajax
A: It means she has a C Section scar.
Q: Why do women have so many pairs of shoes? - Manmeet, Brampton
A: Because none of the shoes fit, but they'll allow each pair to hurt their feet once.
Q: I do not understand. Why would they buy shoes that do not fit?
A: Because truly fashionable shoes are only manufactured in sizes 2-5, and 99.7% of women over the age of 21 have feet sized 6 or larger.
Q: Size 5 feet? Who has feet that small?
A: Ariana Grande.
Q: So why do they buy shoes that do not fit?
A: Because Cinderella had little tiny feet that could fit the glass slipper, and she was beautiful, and the prince married her and she got to live in Barbie's Dream House. Her wicked step sisters all had big feet, and they ended up doing her housework. If a woman can cram her foot into a shoe two or three sizes too small, if only for a few hours, it means she has a beautiful face, at least until midnight, when she turns back into a pumpkin. Or something like that. I was really young when my older sister explained that.
Q: But why does the shoe company make the shoes so small? Surely they would sell more, if they made them in larger sizes?
A: No they wouldn't. Keep in mind that the manufacturer is only interested in one thing: Selling shoes. He doesn't care if anyone wears the shoes once they're sold. In fact, he doesn't want anyone who buys the shoes to wear them more than once. He just wants women with regular sized feet to buy a new pair of shoes every time they go out. If women could wear a pair of shoes more than once, the manufacturer would lose a sale for each time the shoes are reused.
It's a little known fact, but women who have feet sized five or less, and are judged to be 8.5 or higher by the sales clerk, don't pay for their shoes; they receive them free, in exchange for wearing them in public. If the woman is a 9.2 or higher, she will receive the shoes for free, and be paid to wear them. Anytime you see a megahottie in Yorkville on a weekday afternoon carrying several trendy shopping bags, chances are, she's receiving sponsorship money from each bag, just like a racing car driver.
Q: Then why do they keep the shoes, if they can't wear them again?
A: To impress their friends, who peek in their closet while they're powdering their noses.
Q; OK, thanks!
