Feeling My Age

[IFUSEEKAMY]

​Why is it sticky in here, Prick?

 

[Baz]

Age is the hoped for inevitable event that occurs to some but not all. Cherish every year with loved ones as if it were your last because in reality it maybe regardless of one's age. If one is of faith they believe the body dies but the soul goes on and hopefully this is the case. BoltUpright, having read many of your posts I can say regardless of the age you are a gentleman at heart and here is hoping many more years of healthy well being for you and your family.

 

[Louis XIV]

Age is the hoped for inevitable event that occurs to some but not all. Cherish every year with loved ones as if it were your last because in reality it maybe regardless of one's age. If one is of faith they believe the body dies but the soul goes on and hopefully this is the case. BoltUpright, having read many of your posts I can say regardless of the age you are a gentleman at heart and here is hoping many more years of healthy well being for you and your family.

Yeah - you're such an amazing judge of character. <rolls eyes> Funny how you're complementing BU for being such a 'gentleman', after recently chastising muckin, when in fact BU is no different than any other man who hobbies - most, by virtue of their actions, are lying cheaters, perpetually conspiring secretly behind their spouses backs for personal gain and the gratuitous and completely selfish pursuit of physical pleasures. Doesn't make them bad people, but it's funny how inconsistent you can be when drawing your personal boundaries of condemnation. Bolt is just like every other hobbyist, no better, no worse.

 

[Baz]

Yeah - you're such an amazing judge of character. <rolls eyes> Funny how you're complementing BU for being such a 'gentleman', after recently chastising muckin, when in fact BU is no different than any other man who hobbies - most, by virtue of their actions, are lying cheaters, perpetually conspiring secretly behind their spouses backs for personal gain and the gratuitous and completely selfish pursuit of physical pleasures. Doesn't make them bad people, but it's funny how inconsistent you can be when drawing your personal boundaries of condemnation. Bolt is just like every other hobbyist, no better, no worse.

I didn't say I agree with his choices, I merely said he conducts himself as a gentleman. I would prefer he works on his marriage but alas I do not have a magical wand but this doesn't mean he's not a gentleman. Muckin's response to my suggestion is what I chastised him on. It was very rude and crass. If the response had been "no I will keep the prize and donate i.e. $$ to charity XYZ" it would have ended there.

 

[Louis XIV]

I didn't say I agree with his choices, I merely said he conducts himself as a gentleman. I would prefer he works on his marriage but alas I do not have a magical wand but this doesn't mean he's not a gentleman.

For the record - I'm not picking on Bolt.

I am pointing out that this is just another example of you having your head up your ass where the hobby and its participants are concerned. An individual who secretly spends the family income on prostitutes, and in fact, secretly welcomes those prostitutes into the family dwelling, and the marital bed, for sexual relations is no 'gentleman'. He is, regardless of reason or rationale, a cheat, a liar, and an entirely unfaithful husband in every way.

It doesn't matter how friendly, non-confrontational, or congenial an individual may be via an anonymous online persona - the facts of the individual's character are incontrovertible, based on their actions. Although a sad truth, for the most part, married hobbyists cannot and should not consider themselves 'gentleman', and to qualify them as such is to show a complete lack of understanding of the 'big picture'.

 

[oldguyzer]

For the record - I'm not picking on Bolt.

I am pointing out that this is just another example of you having your head up your ass where the hobby and its participants are concerned. An individual who secretly spends the family income on prostitutes, and in fact, secretly welcomes those prostitutes into the family dwelling, and the marital bed, for sexual relations is no 'gentleman'. He is, regardless of reason or rationale, a cheat, a liar, and an entirely unfaithful husband in every way.

It doesn't matter how friendly, non-confrontational, or congenial an individual may be via an anonymous online persona - the facts of the individual's character are incontrovertible, based on their actions. Although a sad truth, for the most part, married hobbyists cannot and should not consider themselves 'gentleman', and to qualify them as such is to show a complete lack of understanding of the 'big picture'.

Your last paragraph is an interesting one, for one simple reason. A century ago, what you said would be absolutely true. Society would brand such a person a cad, and definately not a gentleman (although to think it didn't happen would be idiotic!). In todays more enlightened environment, where something like 70% of all married men and women have had at least one extra-marital arrangement, does that really brand the male in question as not a gentleman? This, of course, comes to the root of your understanding of gentleman.

 

[Guido]

For the record - I'm not picking on Bolt.

I am pointing out that this is just another example of you having your head up your ass where the hobby and its participants are concerned. An individual who secretly spends the family income on prostitutes, and in fact, secretly welcomes those prostitutes into the family dwelling, and the marital bed, for sexual relations is no 'gentleman'. He is, regardless of reason or rationale, a cheat, a liar, and an entirely unfaithful husband in every way.

It doesn't matter how friendly, non-confrontational, or congenial an individual may be via an anonymous online persona - the facts of the individual's character are incontrovertible, based on their actions. Although a sad truth, for the most part, married hobbyists cannot and should not consider themselves 'gentleman', and to qualify them as such is to show a complete lack of understanding of the 'big picture'.

Although Brazo is out to lunch I do have to disagree with a hobbyist cannot be a gentleman line because you never know of one's relationship at home. Many guys get no lovin at home for a variety of reasons.

I can give you a few examples of gentlemen and hobbyist who may or may not be with us today.

Art Man,
Hmmmmmm,

I'm thinking don't rush me

Hmmmmmm

ChaosTheory,

Hmmmmmm Hmmmmmm wow this is harder than I thought

Lone Wolf

HmmmmmmHmmmmmmHmmmmmm

Swede


See, told ya we have gentlemen among us!:biggrin2:

 

[Louis XIV]

Your last paragraph is an interesting one, for one simple reason. A century ago, what you said would be absolutely true. Society would brand such a person a cad, and definately not a gentleman (although to think it didn't happen would be idiotic!). In todays more enlightened environment, where something like 70% of all married men and women have had at least one extra-marital arrangement, does that really brand the male in question as not a gentleman? This, of course, comes to the root of your understanding of gentleman.

As I said above, I don't believe that partaking in the hobby makes married men 'bad people'. Far from it. But the notion of being a 'gentleman' has always been closely tied with the social convention of being 'honorable'. Given that most men who hobby are married, the fact that they are lying and cheating on their spouses, undertaking in considerable physical, financial, and social risk that could have significant, if not catastrophic impacts and outcomes on the family unit doesn't inspire an image of honorable behavior on the part of the hobbyist.

You need look no further than your own SO, and the social majority who would broadly condemn and publicly vilify a convicted hobbyist as having acted largely in a dishonorable manner with regards to significant personal and professional stakeholders.

I sometimes wonder if we brand ourselves 'gentlemen' within the hobby as a means to rationalize and counter the truth, and to some degree the inherent guilt that is felt as a result of the knowledge we are all less than honorable men where our wives, children, employers, and social circle of friends and extended family are concerned.

 

[Louis XIV]

Although Brazo is out to lunch I do have to disagree with a hobbyist cannot be a gentleman line because you never know of one's relationship at home. Many guys get no lovin at home for a variety of reasons.

I can give you a few examples of gentlemen and hobbyist who may or may not be with us today.

Art Man,
Hmmmmmm,

I'm thinking don't rush me

Hmmmmmm

ChaosTheory,

Hmmmmmm Hmmmmmm wow this is harder than I thought

Lone Wolf

HmmmmmmHmmmmmmHmmmmmm

Swede


See, told ya we have gentlemen among us!:biggrin2:

Guido - Just because some guys aren't getting any at home, or aren't getting the flavour they desire at home, isn't really a totally justifiable reason to act in a largely dishonorable or disingenuous manner towards one's SO. In this community of like-minded individuals who partake, it is an acceptable reason for what I would term 'breaking the rules', but in the big scheme of things, and to the people that matter in civilized society, we're still liars, cheats, and exploiters. The guys you mentioned, as well as many others, are well-regarded hobbyists highly thought of by fellow members of the community and the providers largely due to their respectful attitude and behavior towards the ladies themselves, the industry at large, and towards other hobbyists. That said, I'm sure that 9 times out of 10 their respective SO's would be less than enthusiastic supporters of their claim to being 'gentlemen' if their secret lives of unfaithful activities were to become public knowledge.

 

[bolt.upright]

I suppose I deserve all these comments, as many of us do. It looks like it's just coming down to semantics, as to what the word "gentleman" really means.


Here's what it says on Dictionary.com:


Gentleman: a civilized, educated, sensitive, or well-mannered man: He behaved like a true gentleman.


So, does that apply if you're cheating on your wife or not? No mention of it in that definition anyway.


It's very hard to defend myself, as all the things that are being said are true. I have cheated on my wife, and I'm planning to continue doing so, as it brings me great pleasure. I haven't really lied to her, only because she has never asked me if I see escorts (or if I'm having sex with any other women for that matter). I guess I am spending the family money, but I do make my own income (as modest as it is), and my family certainly isn't starving. I probably come close to matching the money my wife spends on shoes, clothes, and dinners out with her friends. That's her entertainment, this is mine. I feel a little guilt, but not enough to stop what I'm doing, I guess.

 

[JessieJames]

I suppose I deserve all these comments, as many of us do. It looks like it's just coming down to semantics, as to what the word "gentleman" really means.


Here's what it says on Dictionary.com:


Gentleman: a civilized, educated, sensitive, or well-mannered man: He behaved like a true gentleman.


So, does that apply if you're cheating on your wife or not? No mention of it in that definition anyway.


It's very hard to defend myself, as all the things that are being said are true. I have cheated on my wife, and I'm planning to continue doing so, as it brings me great pleasure. I haven't really lied to her, only because she has never asked me if I see escorts (or if I'm having sex with any other women for that matter). I guess I am spending the family money, but I do make my own income (as modest as it is), and my family certainly isn't starving. I probably come close to matching the money my wife spends on shoes, clothes, and dinners out with her friends. That's her entertainment, this is mine. I feel a little guilt, but not enough to stop what I'm doing, I guess.

Very well stated Bolt.

Louis, to use the word exploiter you are buying into the the Harper government definition of exploitation. Paid sex between consenting adults if far from exploitation because both parties are receiving a material benefit in the transaction. This is a service like any other service i.e massage therapy, nails, waxing etc...and it should be look upon as such. The status of "gentleman" or any other status, title should NOT be taken away because one enjoys the company of paid company provided it falls under the umbrella of consensual.

I need to pinch myself because I cannot believe I'm agreeing more with Baz than Louis.

 

[Louis XIV]

Very well stated Bolt.

Louis, to use the word exploiter you are buying into the the Harper government definition of exploitation. Paid sex between consenting adults if far from exploitation because both parties are receiving a material benefit in the transaction. This is a service like any other service i.e massage therapy, nails, waxing etc...and it should be look upon as such. The status of "gentleman" or any other status, title should NOT be taken away because one enjoys the company of paid company provided it falls under the umbrella of consensual.

I need to pinch myself because I cannot believe I'm agreeing more with Baz than Louis.

Re-read my post. I am not stating MY personal opinion on the subject. I stated that in 'the big scheme of things, and to the people that matter in civilized society, we're still liars, cheats, and exploiters.'. That is an indisputable fact.

Bolt, Jessie - as yourself these simple questions: Would a true 'gentleman' lie, either implicitly or explicitly, to the woman he married? Would he cheat on his wife with another woman, paid or unpaid as the case may be? Would he disrespect her by bringing another woman secretly into the marital bed? You guys seem to be trying to assuage your guilt and rationalize your behavior because you can't face the truth. You may be 'nice' guys, but you are no gentlemen. Sorry for the inconvenient truths.

 

[Guido]

Re-read my post. I am not stating MY personal opinion on the subject. I stated that in 'the big scheme of things, and to the people that matter in civilized society, we're still liars, cheats, and exploiters.'. That is an indisputable fact.

Bolt, Jessie - as yourself these simple questions: Would a true 'gentleman' lie, either implicitly or explicitly, to the woman he married? Would he cheat on his wife with another woman, paid or unpaid as the case may be? Would he disrespect her by bringing another woman secretly into the marital bed? You guys seem to be trying to assuage your guilt and rationalize your behavior because you can't face the truth. You may be 'nice' guys, but you are no gentlemen. Sorry for the inconvenient truths.

Louis
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[Louis XIV]

Louis
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:LMAO: Good one!

 

[Transient]

Bolt is pursuing what makes him happy and allows himself to also meet his responsibilities. Continue enjoying yourself Bolt, that's what life is all about. Rather than being in a situation that might turn ugly and ruin more lives, he is choosing a solution that satisfies his recreational needs and his family obligation.
Rock on Bolt.

 

[Louis XIV]

Bolt is pursuing what makes him happy and allows himself to also meet his responsibilities. Continue enjoying yourself Bolt, that's what life is all about. Rather than being in a situation that might turn ugly and ruin more lives, he is choosing a solution that satisfies his recreational needs and his family obligation.
Rock on Bolt.

Like I said before, no one is purposely picking on Bolt. He is very much the same guy as all the other members here, looking to satisfy a personal need while maintaining a reasonable real life balance. I agree that he likely has the respect of the hobby community given his very positive demeanor, attitude, and approach to the hobby itself and those that participate/contribute to it.

I take issue with Baz's constant self-contradicting trolling in a domain which he obviously knows nothing about.

 

[muckin]

..... Muckin's response to my suggestion is what I chastised him on. It was very rude and crass. If the response had been "no I will keep the prize and donate i.e. $$ to charity XYZ" it would have ended there.

oh my goodness I was chastised by Baz, how will I sleep at night?:LMAO: and for the record I will keep the prize and donate to the charity CIM. LOL

 

[IFUSEEKAMY]

A gentleman would have perhaps started a new thread.

 

[papasmerf]

A gentleman would have perhaps started a new thread.

Amy,

The breakdown in this thread has been very disturbing.

 

[Louis XIV]

Hmmmmmm