Nothing worse than taking a dump at someone else's home.

[Boing]

It's cottage season and decided to start early. My Muskoka place is under upgrade renovations and staying at a pal's place. After the drive I go to the John to take my dump, 5 minutes later my lady says. Hey Boing hurry up there is a line up here.

WTF I said it's not my fault they only have one washroom, go pee in the forest.

I then couldn't do it anymore the pressure of pushing was too much for me had to cut ties but pissed off.

Any of you had a problem similar to mine and had did you deal with it.

Yes call it a bullshit story but I am sure I am not the only one that has gone through this.

 

[Robintheboywonder]

It's a crime to disturb a man while shitting. Did you at least have matches with you?

 

[Mason]

Dump your lady.

 

[Al Bumin]

This is like having a short lease.

 

[Johnnybehorny]

Is there anything wrong with meditation while sitting on the toilet?

One of the only free time in the day one gets is when in the bathroom, so why do they bother us when meditating?



:don'twantto-see:/

 

[Senor Gomes]

Hide the toilet paper for the next occupant.


That will teach them to leave a man in his throne without being disturbed.

 

[HOF]

Your story is constipating us all!

 

[User-E]

Your story is constipating us all!

:rofl!:

 

[Maurice Boscorelli]

Just go for a walk in said Forrest Boing And do your business in harmony with nature.

Watch out for poison Ivy though,lol.

 

[JustJohn]

What a shitty thread.:biggrin2:

 

[Pearldiver]

Wondering what the etiquette is for taking a dump at an incall. Had lunch at a spicy thai food place followed by an appointment at an agency. Well that food hit me like a freight train just as I was entering the condo. I had to cancel and run to the closest Tim's. Barely mad it. would anybody have used the incall washroom?

 

[papasmerf]

Wondering what the etiquette is for taking a dump at an incall. Had lunch at a spicy thai food place followed by an appointment at an agency. Well that food hit me like a freight train just as I was entering the condo. I had to cancel and run to the closest Tim's. Barely mad it. would anybody have used the incall washroom?

YMMV

 

[HOF]

I do have a bathroom kit in a small bag for my car. Just in case! It's got toilet paper, wet ones and other things that would be in a bathroom. You never know when your car might break down or your bowels might send an ugly message.

 

[SillyGirl]

Many years ago I had a job pushing paper in a direct-sales office. One winter morning a sales rep came in and I asked how his appointment had gone the night before.

He said he was about halfway through his sales presentation when he was hit by an urgent need to go. He asked if he could use the bathroom, but it was under repair and the toilet wasn't working. Feigning the need to get something from his car, he went outside and took a dump in their backyard.

He went back in and completed his presentation, and was happy when the customer wanted to buy. He had to make arrangements to complete the sale the next day, because he had just used his last blank invoice to wipe his ass.

In the spring when the snow melted, he got a call from the customer who had just found the invoice in his yard. Customer said "I think my dog got into it", and we didn't correct him.

 

[HOOKED]

That is hilarious SillyGirl.

PearlDiver I've had a few instances of being hit with the feeling at the worst times. I once was pulled over for going through a stop sign. The Officer came to my car and by this point I was lifting my butt off the seat. He asked me if I'd been drinking and I responded

"No sir, I'm so sorry but I really have to go to the bathroom. I'm sorry I went through the stop sign but I really really need to go."

He frowned at me and asked to see my DL , insurance and ownership, I was dying and let one of the most disgusting sharts out and if you could see the look on the officer's face as the bubbling gases infiltrated his nostrils. :biggrin2: He handed back my ID and told me to get going and drive carefully.

It wasn't one of my proudest moments but it did save me a ticket and 3 points.:biggrin2:

 

[User-E]

I'm interested in bear scat because you can pick it apart for research and see what they've been eating.

I've seen marmots feasting on it.



I'm puzzled by the plethora of threads on human waste though ... Hmmmmmm

 

[papasmerf]

I'm interested in bear scat because you can pick it apart for research and see what they've been eating.

I've seen marmots feasting on it.



I'm puzzled by the plethora of threads on human waste though ... Hmmmmmm

Cabin Fever

 

[User-E]

Cabin Fever

You mean men have run out of things to think about after a long winter stuck at home with fully clothed women?

:biggrin2:

 

[papasmerf]

You mean men have run out of things to think about after a long winter stuck at home with fully clothed women?

:biggrin2:

Pretty much so

and that degrades into potty talk

 

[Goodfella]

This your lady, Boing?.