The YMMV card

[Fuggedabouditt]

Ever been a victim of YMMV and getting low mileage while the majority seem to get exactly what she's advertising?

Signs of a poor SP? Shouldn't they be providing the same service for everyone no matter? I've heard many stories about a clients hygiene playing a part; why not just send him back in to the shower. Better yet, go in and give him a hand.

There have been a few ladies that I've heard chime in on this and agreeing with me. A lady should not discriminate. Does one who does seem entitled or should not be in the industry?

 

[Azura Rose]

Well, to a certain extent I see where you're coming from. But from my perspective, I'm going to be more willing for a guy to be rougher BDSM-wise if he -isn't- constantly whipping me in the kidneys. Someone who knows how to tie properly is going to be able to tie me, whereas a guy who keeps doing unsafe slipknots is not. A guy who respects my limits on DT is going to get a CBJ, whereas a guy who keeps pushing isn't getting CBJ at all. A guy who starts chewing on my tongue is not going to get DFK anymore.

I only stop with a service if the person makes giving that service impossible to tolerate. But, really, neither of us are going to want to repeat a session in that case. It's a two-way street. If you're not treating your SP with respect, we're not going to reciprocate.

Sometimes it's also about a cramp or canker sore or something. It's not your fault, but something has happened and the SP is trying to gracefully manage the session so that it's enjoyable and they can give the best service possible otherwise. Sometimes a client shows up and looks like a family member or Ex. At the end of the day, you're paying for their time, and they can withdraw consent at any time, as can you. It sucks when you don't feel you got the service that you paid for, definitely, but a bit of empathy in both directions can go a long way. It's part of why I try to be honest if it's just a toothache, so a gentleman doesn't feel like it's at all his fault when it's not!

 

[Fuggedabouditt]

Well, to a certain extent I see where you're coming from. But from my perspective, I'm going to be more willing for a guy to be rougher BDSM-wise if he -isn't- constantly whipping me in the kidneys. Someone who knows how to tie properly is going to be able to tie me, whereas a guy who keeps doing unsafe slipknots is not. A guy who respects my limits on DT is going to get a CBJ, whereas a guy who keeps pushing isn't getting CBJ at all. A guy who starts chewing on my tongue is not going to get DFK anymore.

I only stop with a service if the person makes giving that service impossible to tolerate. But, really, neither of us are going to want to repeat a session in that case. It's a two-way street. If you're not treating your SP with respect, we're not going to reciprocate.

Sometimes it's also about a cramp or canker sore or something. It's not your fault, but something has happened and the SP is trying to gracefully manage the session so that it's enjoyable and they can give the best service possible otherwise. Sometimes a client shows up and looks like a family member or Ex. At the end of the day, you're paying for their time, and they can withdraw consent at any time, as can you. It sucks when you don't feel you got the service that you paid for, definitely, but a bit of empathy in both directions can go a long way. It's part of why I try to be honest if it's just a toothache, so a gentleman doesn't feel like it's at all his fault when it's not!

Thanks for this Azura; I can honestly say that it has been some of my experiences with ladies on the YMMV have some standing on their current health situation, like you said, a canker sore or cramps that limit the service. I'm totally okay with that and it proves to me that she can be open and honest and not throwing out the YMMV card because she doesn't get a good vibe from me.

It sounds like you're prepared to provide the same service to everyone but pull the plug if the client is disrespectful. This is totally understandable and commended that you want to and strive to be a good provider.

As for your particular kink of BDSM, I would assume that the client would let you know if he is a first timer or not very experienced and you can walk him through things. If not, I've seen OASIS have some classes on BDSM. I'm beginning to be more and more familiar with this fetish and have experimented with some great success and ropes and dominance. Kink Den is a great way to learn.

 

[ERecTile]

@Azura Rose, I'd never considered myself a bdsm kind of guy, but suddenly I feel like adding some ropes to my TDL. Not sure yet if I want to tie the girl, or be tied myself. I'm not normally dominant or submissive either way so this bears some thinking... :whip:

 

[Azura Rose]

@Fuggedabouditt Yeah, definitely. It's so much better to just communicate if it's a health issue or something. As for learning BDSM, Oasis is pretty awesome, as is KinkDen. I'm totally fine with beginners so long as they're open about it and willing to get some pointers. Everyone starts somewhere, the issue is when people start being misleading about their skill levels or get ego invested into it (which can happen even/especially with advanced folks!)
@ERecTile I definitely suggest trying it out if you've been curious. And it's totally possible to do rope without involving any power dynamic role play into it. It can be purely about another way of playing with sensation and touch! I can both tie and be tied, and I'm sure there are other SPs who can also do the same. In fact, there are probably switches at KinkDen or other dungeons/indy kink folks who are happy to go both ways so to speak. If you already have seen an SP you enjoy who also provides kink, it could be worth asking if they can accommodate

 

[Fuggedabouditt]

@ Yeah, definitely. It's so much better to just communicate if it's a health issue or something. As for learning BDSM, Oasis is pretty awesome, as is KinkDen. I'm totally fine with beginners so long as they're open about it and willing to get some pointers. Everyone starts somewhere, the issue is when people start being misleading about their skill levels or get ego invested into it (which can happen even/especially with advanced folks!)
@ I definitely suggest trying it out if you've been curious. And it's totally possible to do rope without involving any power dynamic role play into it. It can be purely about another way of playing with sensation and touch! I can both tie and be tied, and I'm sure there are other SPs who can also do the same. In fact, there are probably switches at KinkDen or other dungeons/indy kink folks who are happy to go both ways so to speak. If you already have seen an SP you enjoy who also provides kink, it could be worth asking if they can accommodate

@Azura-Rose - I don't expose this kink/fetish on my first visits with any of my faves. I think it's very important to get comfortable and trust each other. The curiosity usually comes up in conversation and if it bears further investigation, then we make plans and talk about each others comfort level. I'm more the Dom but am not opposed to switching.
@ERecTile - see above. It adds a whole new facet to your sessions. Fetish Fantasy Studios has a whole incall that caters to this. I suggest you try it with one of your faves.

 

[Boing]

Praise-Bowing

 

[ERecTile]

Thanks Azura and Fuggie! I don't have any faves at the moment. I'm still trying to work my way through the Sassy roster! I was coming to the end of my hobby bucket list when I had an epiphany. Why should I cross everything off so fast? Best to just enjoy it for as long as the money lasts!

As for YMMV, yeah, I'm still trying to wrap my head around the whole mileage thing with SPs. Maybe it's a reference to your overall enjoyment? If it is, then I hold to the the "we are responsible for at least half of our enjoyment" attitude. SPs are people too, and while they may openly discuss their "menu", and may even dish out the menu during a session, a client's enjoyment of those services will depend in no small part on him. For example, did he use the mouthwash liberally? Did it clean under the foreskin? Does he have basic people skills and basic human decency and respect? If a client goes in to a session with a new SP with all those questions (and others) answered with a yes, then I'd say his chances of truly enjoying the session will be a lot higher.

I get it though. Some guys just want to get in, get out, get off. But just sex is never enough for me.

 

[What A Wookie]

@ERecTile for the most part you're correct but there are cases where you can do everything you mentioned and more but you'll still get the short end of the ymmv stick.

 

[Cardinal Fang]

Ever been a victim of YMMV and getting low mileage while the majority seem to get exactly what she's advertising?

I think this is only ever happened to me a few times early on in seeing escorts. In those cases I can honestly say I never truy "clicked" with the escort and therefore never really anticipated in getting the mileage others had talked about.

As time went on and I got better at selecting escorts that better fit my tastes I can honestly say I've gotten the mileage and in some cases better than most. Doesn't hurt that my hat and red robe makes the women wet.

 

[Jasper]

YMMV applies in every industry involving human interaction. It's normal.
People will give varying service depending on who they're dealing with or how they're feeling mentally or physically. They aren't machines, thankfully.

A lady should not discriminate. Does one who does seem entitled or should not be in the industry?

If you approach one thinking they seem to feel entitled, you're getting off to a bad start.

 

[oldguyzer]

YMMV depends on so many factors, it's impossible to predict. But, treat them right, be polite and listen, and you'll be amazed what comes your way, even when things are not available.

 

[Fuj]

Good replies from the pro's.

YMMV gets beter after the second time around and none can deny that.

 

[Fuggedabouditt]

Good replies from the pro's.

YMMV gets beter after the second time around and none can deny that.

Very well might be good advice, BUT, why would you go back if YMMV varied on the low side? I wouldn't repeat, why would you?

 

[oldguyzer]

Very well might be good advice, BUT, why would you go back if YMMV varied on the low side? I wouldn't repeat, why would you?

We live in hope

 

[Cardinal Fang]

We live in hope

How far is that from Toronto?

 

[User-E]

How far is that from Toronto?

​

4,263.3 km

 

[papasmerf]

4,263.3 km

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So 6 maybe 7 miles?

 

[User-E]

.
So 6 maybe 7 miles?

Sounds about right. Hmmmmmm

 

[papasmerf]

Sounds about right. Hmmmmmm

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that is what I thunk.