I need an advice on dating an SP

[Milko]

I believe these kind of threads are created frequently on every review board there is, however I need some help. I admit I discovered this forum recently, as I was using other alternatives before. But it is convenient as I can use different name for both mine and girl in question protection.

I guess I have to give some background info before I get into what's bothering me.

So it all started back in early January. The positive reviews led me to meet this amazing girl from one of the agencies who advertise here. We hit it off right away, conversation was easy, sex was amazing and I even got items that weren't part of the regular menu right away. At first I just shrugged it off as a good mileage, and didn't pay much attention to it. However I started to frequent her, about 2-3 times a month.

And few months back things started to escalate. At first she started to talk how much fun would it be to not be pressured by time, how much she'd love to have me over at her place, to cook dinner and hang out. She revealed to me a lot about herself, by now I know where she works, her address, real first and last name, her e-mail and her phone number, so we can keep in touch at all times.

I want to take her out, outside of agency incall, but she's afraid. She's afraid her boss finds out and reveals what she does to her family, she keeps saying that she just needs to pay off one debt, that is pretty hefty and it might take her another half a year to do so. She has a full time job so she escorts for 1-3 days a week tops. But I just can't wait that long, I am falling for her so badly that I just can't keep on doing client/sp thing for that long.

So I am asking you, how do I convince her to take the next step? Or should I? Normally I'd be blunt and tell the girl right away, but I realize the delicate nature of the situation, so I don't want to scare her off, as she does mean a lot to me. The way she wants to do it is to keep the way things are, until she retires. But that is too fucking long. So I am at loss here what to do. And no, I don't have a problem with what she does, if she didn't do it the chances of us meeting would be non existent.

And before somebody suggests she's after my money, well I don't have any lol. And I made it pretty clear to her. I earned just over $50,000 last year.

Any thoughts advice? None of my friends even know that I hobby, it sucks so bad to not be able to talk to anyone

 

[papasmerf]

remember and remind her, it is just a job and not a definition of who she is

 

[L._s.]

Hi,

If you are getting sex for free and she goes out with you and you have stopped paying for incall / outcall sex. Then it is real. Otherwise, you are trapped in fantasy land.

Just a realist. I don't intend to offend.

 

[oldguyzer]

If you can handle her working while you are together, then tell her that, be supportive, and never ask about work. Otherwise you'll go nuts. It can and does work, but you both need to be honest and supportive. And don't dwell on her "job".

 

[Milko]

Hi,

If you are getting sex for free and she goes out with you and you have stopped paying for incall / outcall sex. Then it is real. Otherwise, you are trapped in fantasy land.

Just a realist. I don't intend to offend.

I was thinking that for a while. However the way things progress, I just don't see her giving away her real name, phone and address to just drum up the business. And she can't just not take the money, she is accountable for it to the agency.

 

[papasmerf]

I was thinking that for a while. However the way things progress, I just don't see her giving away her real name, phone and address to just drum up the business. And she can't just not take the money, she is accountable for it to the agency.

then to her you are just a trick

 

[Milko]

If you can handle her working while you are together, then tell her that, be supportive, and never ask about work. Otherwise you'll go nuts. It can and does work, but you both need to be honest and supportive. And don't dwell on her "job".

Thank you and I realize that. It is hard, I admit. But my focus isn't on what she does, but on what a wonderful woman she is.

 

[Milko]

then to her you are just a trick

Can you expand? Not sure what you mean?

 

[papasmerf]

Can you expand? Not sure what you mean?

you are paying her to date you.

a relationship is based on mutual give and take not you give she takes.

put your heart away and move on

 

[Milko]

you are paying her to date you.

a relationship is based on mutual give and take not you give she takes.

put your heart away and move on

Thank you for the input. But wouldn't it be the way for most if not all sp/client relationships to evolve outside of sp/client relationship? That is what I am struggling with, instead of it being a business transaction, I want it to be more, and I believe so does she. Hence my biggest question is how to convenience her to do so.

 

[-b]

If you really care this Lady then you would do what she has asked and wait
for her to pay off the debt.......

Why would an Agency tell her Parents.....If that the case I think that
is discussing.....and I would never visit that Agency.....This is how Escorting
gets a bad rap......

As for the Lady ....ask yourself this would she have gone out with you if she just met
you at a club or store.....

 

[papasmerf]

Thank you for the input. But wouldn't it be the way for most if not all sp/client relationships to evolve outside of sp/client relationship? That is what I am struggling with, instead of it being a business transaction, I want it to be more, and I believe so does she. Hence my biggest question is how to convenience her to do so.

ask her
and if there is any hedging move on

 

[Milko]

If you really care this Lady then you would do what she has asked and wait
for her to pay off the debt.......

Why would an Agency tell her Parents.....If that the case I think that
is discussing.....and I would never visit that Agency.....This is how Escorting
gets a bad rap......

As for the Lady ....ask yourself this would she have gone out with you if she just met
you at a club or store.....

I can tell you are visiting the agency. Yeah their practices are shady, so are their splits, but ignorance is a bliss. And I got the info from her, so I can't advertise who, where or how.

 

[Milko]

ask her
and if there is any hedging move on

I did and I will again. However I can't ignore her wishes. What if I am a bitter prick who can't take it and tell her family what she does/did? Those are valid concerns for her.

 

[papasmerf]

I did and I will again. However I can't ignore her wishes. What if I am a bitter prick who can't take it and tell her family what she does/did? Those are valid concerns for her.

you will make many more mistakes in your life
accept them and move on, until the next one

 

[Prick]

Don't do it. Find yourself a nice girl and see SP when you want to fuck without any attachments.

Very simple.

 

[Cardinal Fang]

Yeah their practices are shady, so are their splits, but ignorance is a bliss. And I got the info from her, so I can't advertise who, where or how.

If they are as shady as you say then it doesn't matter if she sees you outside the agency or not. They could choose to humiliate her regardless of what she does with you. They could choose to humiliate her as leverage once she pays off her debts. You can't predict their response.

What if I am a bitter prick who can't take it and tell her family what she does/did? Those are valid concerns for her.

I think you have your answer right here in this statement. As long as she's in this agency and seeing you she's constantly looking over her shoulder. Pressuring her or trying to convince her won't make matters easier for her. They may exacerbate the situation and make it worse. State your intentions and give her space. That's really all you can do.

 

[-b]

Don't do it. Find yourself a nice girl and see SP when you want to fuck without any attachments.

Very simple.

Why is there always a difference between an Escort and as you say Nice Girl......They are all women...
They all work....does not matter the Job.....Nice Girls also Screw too......with lots of men....
If you find a woman you love does not matter.....Just as if a woman finds a man.....
There are all types of Men and Women who are deceitful.....

Women are women.....the job does not make us but how we treat and are treated.....

 

[Milko]

If they are as shady as you say then it doesn't matter if she sees you outside the agency or not. They could choose to humiliate her regardless of what she does with you. They could choose to humiliate her as leverage once she pays off her debts. You can't predict their response.


I think you have your answer right here in this statement. As long as she's in this agency and seeing you she's constantly looking over her shoulder. Pressuring her or trying to convince her won't make matters easier for her. They may exacerbate the situation and make it worse. State your intentions and give her space. That's really all you can do.

The thing is those concerns don't go away if she retires either. So she will be looking over her shoulder even if he retires and we're happily dating? Assuming I am a prick, I can out her in front of the family any time. That's the thing, she wants to keep escorting as far away from her personal life as she can, yet she wants to bring me in. I guess I need to earn her trust even more, but then again she trusts me with her personal info most sp don't share? I have no idea what to make out of it.

 

[Milko]

Don't do it. Find yourself a nice girl and see SP when you want to fuck without any attachments.

Very simple.

I did. She happens to be an sp.